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A WHOSA-WHATSA-VERT?

What is an introvert?

Introverts gain energy by being alone. Stimulating environments and social situations are draining for introverts. We can only handle so much before we MUST restore ourselves in solitude.

This is where many people are confused about introversion. It’s not about wanting to avoid people because of shyness, or sadness. Introverts NEED to spend time alone to feel at our best. Plain and simple.

In contrast, extroverts are energized by socializing. They get a buzz from the very activities that overwhelm introverts. When extroverts spend too much time alone, they feel bored and depleted.

Neither personality type is superior, we simply have different needs.

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LATEST FROM THE BLOG

INFJ Relationships: 4 Steps To Deep Connection

INFJ relationships can be tricky. We want deep, soul-shaking connection. But we don’t always know how to get there. Our personality consists of only 1 percent of the world population. We are rare, and not so easy to understand. Our rarity can be challenging, but it is also our greatest gift. We are unique, therefore we need a unique connection as well.☺ Establishing a lasting connection is a defining moment in our life. INFJ relationships are based on our magnificent ability to connect with our partners. The blueprint for connection in INFJ relationships is based on understanding. Not many people will be wired the same way we are. When we connect with someone, this truly is a magical moment for INFJs. Connection Surpasses Introversion or Extroversion My relationships were mostly directed towards extroverted women. I never asked myself why this is the case. I simply followed my intuition. One relationship in particular stands out. Six years ago I met someone who I thought was my soulmate. This was the first time I felt true love. What made this so special was the insanely good connection we had. We literally finished each other’s sentences. Never did I once pay attention to the fact that she is an extrovert. It didn’t matter. All that was important to me was that we understood each other. For the first time I told myself: “I can be vulnerable with this person, and not be afraid.” The relationship didn’t last, but I will never forget what we had. It didn’t matter that we had different personality types. It was that pure, authentic connection that mattered most. Here... read more

3 Ways HSP Introverts Can Avoid Vacation Overwhelm

If you’re a highly sensitive (HSP) introvert like me, you understand how challenging this can be. As an HSP introvert, you know what it’s like to feel mentally and physically exhausted after doing everyday activities, like going to a crowded grocery store. Or giving a presentation. Or taking the subway. Being an HSP introvert means that … You are more aware of subtleties in your environment. You notice smells, sounds, and sights that others miss. Your sensitivity to even subtle stimuli makes you prone to overwhelm. You are more sensitive to your own emotions. You feel things deeply, and tend to spend more time reflecting on your feelings. This is why you have strong reactions to violent movies and TV shows. You are empathetic, which means that you are deeply affected by other people’s moods. You literally feel the emotions of others. This can be exhausting if you don’t know how to create emotional and energetic boundaries. You are particularly sensitive to caffeine. You are prone to suffering from social hangovers. Sometimes, you need days to recover from a single social event. To clarify, not all introverts are highly sensitive, BUT about 70% of HSPs are introverts. This makes the HSP/introvert combination surprisingly common. Still, few people understand how hard it is to be highly sensitive and introverted in a busybody, extrovert-biased culture. Don’t get me wrong, being an HSP introvert has its advantages: strong intuition, keen observation skills, creativity. And it’s perfectly possible to tailor your lifestyle to suit your unique needs. This is exactly what I’ve done. Nowadays, I rarely notice my sensitivity when I’m at work,... read more

INFJ: I came, I saw, I made it awkward

The annoying feeling of awkwardness is something INFJ’s are all too familiar with. We often feel awkward, because we can see something few others can see. We sense those hidden signals that no one else feels. This is a feeling I’m sure many of you can relate to. I am going to share with you my own awkward story. Not many people know what I am about to tell you. In other words, I feel completely “naked”, and exposed. So here goes. ☺ Young and awkward Throughout the entire high-school period, I was bullied. For me, every day was a fight for survival. I felt alone, didn’t know who to turn to. I would go to school crying, anxious, and afraid. My daily plan was merely to survive, and come home. One day, something happened that made me feel like the King of Awkwardness. Read The Full Article By Joining Our Free Private INFJ Forum >> Introvert’s Spring’s INFJ Forum INFJs rarely meet one another in the ‘real world’. Become an Introvert Spring INFJ and meet INFJs across the globe. Join our private forum and discuss INFJ problems, solutions, and idiosyncrasies. Start your own discussion topics or join a popular thread. You’ll also discover unique INFJ blog posts and infographics. Join The INFJ Forum Now – It’s Free!... read more

Introvert: Stop saying yes to sh*t you hate

We introverts tend to say yes to a lot of things out of guilt. Can you blame us? We feel enormous pressure to fit into a culture that worships extroversion. More specifically, we feel pressure to be outgoing busybodies with a packed social calendar. The desire to keep up with the extrovert ideal drives introverts to say yes to all sorts of things we hate. What we risk by saying no We secretly believe that if we say no, our life could start to unravel. We imagine saying no will lead our coworkers to think we’re mean, lazy, or (gasp!) genuinely too busy to do their job for them. Our acquaintances will realize how unloveable and despicable we really are and create a secret club that gathers weekly for the sole purpose of talking behind our back. Our chance at real success – the kind that involves money, admiration, and endless attention on Twitter – could be lost forever. These are just a few of the irrational fears that keep us from saying no to shit we hate. The truth is that saying no to needless obligations frees up time and energy for more worthwhile things. You know, like activities we actually enjoy, and benefit from. The most common no’s for introverts The things we secretly want to say no to vary from one introvert to the next. Our list often includes social obligations, such as happy hour with coworkers, or holiday parties. Perhaps, we’re dying to say no to community obligations, like strata meetings, or fundraising efforts. Parents might feel the urge to say no to heading up the next school bake sale, or book drive. Many of us desperately want to say no to work opportunities... read more

Introvert: Is Your Voice Attractive? Free Training

We all know introverts are quiet. But that doesn’t mean we always want to stay silent. Sometimes, our voice – the very thing that is meant to help us communicate – prevents connection. If our eyes are the window to the soul, our voice is the doorway.  For introverts, it often feels more like a narrow gate through which words may or may not sneak out. How To Achieve An Attractive Voice Like many introverts, I’ve struggled to achieve my most natural and confident voice. Rather than using my most attractive voice, I made the BIG mistake many introverts make, which actually strained my vocal cords. Since then I’ve learned that achieving an attractive voice is easy when you know a few key secrets. I also see what I was doing wrong. I recognize why I was unknowingly losing energy and confidence by misusing my voice. In this Wednesday’s F-R-E-E webinar, you’ll learn all about the big vocal mistake I was making PLUS the secrets to sounding incredible as an introvert. **UPDATE: The webinar is now over, but you can access Roger’s Free vocal training videos here. Charismatic Voice Training For Introverts This Wednesday April 27th at 1pm Pacific, celebrity vocal coach Roger Love and I will teach introverts how to develop undeniable confidence and charisma through the power of the voice. Best of all, we’ll show you how to do it in your own introverted way. In the F-R-E-E Charismatic Voice Training For Introverts webinar, you’ll discover: The big mistake most introverts make with their voice + how to avoid it 3 Simple steps for introverts to develop an irresistibly confident... read more

INFJ Door-Slam: Our defence Mechanism

The decision to resort to a Door-Slam is one of the hardest moments an INFJ will ever face. This is our last resort, our absolute limit. When we do it, we don’t look back. At that point, we are done. This is our ultimate defence mechanism. My parents said to me once: “Protect yourself from harm. Always. Help anyone you can, but decide which person is going to be worth your time.” These words still echo inside my head. They find their way to the surface when I am forced to do the INFJ Door Slam. Many INFJ’s will, and quite often have resorted to the Door Slam. Our personality makes us caring, supportive, emotional, and loving. We will move mountains for those we cherish the most. We will swallow our pride. Simply put, we will do everything we can to sustain a friendship or a relationship. But even we have our limits. Crossing the limit A few years ago, I had a friend who was someone I couldn’t imagine living without. She was my biggest support. But as time passed, lies and deceptions began to occur for no particular reason. All of a sudden, I found myself in a toxic friendship that was influencing me in a terrible way … Read The Full Article By Joining Our Free Private INFJ Forum >> Introvert’s Spring’s INFJ Forum INFJs rarely meet one another in the ‘real world’. Become an Introvert Spring INFJ and meet INFJs across the globe. Join our private forum and discuss INFJ problems, solutions, and idiosyncrasies. Start your own discussion topics or join a popular thread. You’ll... read more

Amy Schumer – The Most Surprising Introvert Celebrity

Of all the introvert celebrities who seem anything BUT introverted, Amy Schumer tops the list. In her hit show Inside Amy Schumer, as well as her movie Trainwreck, which she wrote and starred in, Schumer seems like the definition of an extrovert. Amy Schumer is outspoken and refreshingly (and sometimes shockingly) unfiltered. Her Trainwreck costar, Tilda Swinton, described her as an “honesty bomb”. Others say she is just plain crude. One thing that no one would ever describe Amy Schumer as is “introverted”. How could someone with such an over-the-top sense of humour be an introvert? Is Amy Schumer Really An Introvert? The most basic definition of an introvert is someone who gains energy from being alone and loses energy in stimulating environments, such as parties, and crowds. We usually see introvert celebrities, such as Amy Schumer, in the spotlight when they’re ‘getting their extrovert on’. But we forget that most artists – whether they be actors, writers, or musicians – spend a lot of time creating and rehearsing behind the scenes. Many introvert celebrities spend countless hours observing their surroundings for inspiration. Then they close the door so they can open their mind to creative ideas. I imagine that memorizing lines is a solo activity, too. As is composing music, or writing a stand-up routine. Amy Schumer is probably a social introvert. She likes to get out there and mix and mingle when she has the energy, but also needs plenty of alone time to recharge. She is also a confident introvert. Her confidence makes many people assume that she is an extrovert. This is because introversion is often confused with... read more

Michaela Chung Uncensored 2016: 10 Surprising Life Updates 

It’s been almost a year since I wrote my last life update Michaela Chung Uncensored : 10 Things You Didn’t Know About The Creator Of Introvert Spring.  A lot has changed since then. So, I figured it’s time to get personal again. The first thing I want to share might sound a little corny. You might not even believe me, but it’s true … I am honestly the happiest I’ve ever been in my life right now. Last year had some really rough patches. I had demons to face, and old, worn out patterns to slay. I’m so happy that I didn’t give up on myself and my vision for my best innie life. I did the work necessary to get to this sweet spot in my journey. By “work”, I don’t mean the 9-5 kind. I’m talking about soul-shaking, heart-wrenching inner work. It is the kind of work I teach my students to do in my introvert courses (yes, I actually practice what I preach). The biggest breakthrough for me in 2016 has been learning to truly and completely love myself. The art of self-love doesn’t always come easily to us introverts. We have years of guilt and shame about our introversion to contend with. As I’ve learned to love myself in both action and thought, the world has reflected love back to me. Like the first flowers of spring, new relationships have blossomed seemingly out of nowhere. Best of all, I feel more at peace with myself than ever. Situations that used to make me hyperventilate don’t phase me because I’ve learned to trust myself. We’ll get to... read more

An Introvert’s Happy Place

I’m writing to you from some place special today. It’s a place that is near and dear to my heart. I’m curled up in a blanket with a hot mug of herbal tea in hand, the ocean within view, and my writing apparatus at my fingertips. In other words, I’m in my happy place. We all know the saying, “happiness is a state of mind”. For introverts, the right environment is key for creating the right state of mind. We need to find our own little introvert friendly happy place. In our happy place, there is probably something soft and cuddly – a blanket, an animal friend, a big comfy couch. there is also likely something that tickles our brain cilia, like music, art supplies, or a pen and paper. Let’s be honest, Netflix is probably accessible, too. We might have a view of nature from our happy place. Perhaps it’s even situated smack dab in the middle of nature – say, under a tree, or on the shores of a private beach. The important thing is that our happy place allows us to retreat from external reality and focus on our internal world. The obstacles to happy No matter where our happy place is located, there are sure to be some obstacles to getting there. Often, the obligation monster creeps up on us the moment we even think of retreating to our happy place. “Oh, but you have too much to do to take a break,” he says. In our culture, we are told that solitude is a sin. Taking time for yourself is unproductive, and therefore, should be... read more
Just noticed, I’m reading every mail you sent! Thanks a lot, you are part of my “evolution”.
I have no words to express how it can help me!
Morgane, Belgium

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Michaela Chung is an introvert author, coach and entrepreneur. Her first book, The Irresistible Introvert will be out July 5th 2016.

Copyright: © Michaela Chung 2016

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