A lot of introverts struggle with anxiety. It turns out that even those of us who think we’re calm cucumbers might have something called “high functioning anxiety”.
High functioning anxiety, which is not a mental health diagnosis, but a catch phrase to describe people with a more covert kind of anxiety, is not always easy to spot.
That’s because the characteristics of someone who struggles with high functioning anxiety are often the opposite of what you’d expect from an anxious person. As the name implies, people with high functioning anxiety have learned to function reasonably well within the life they’ve carefully crafted for themselves.
To understand what I mean, I’ve put together 10 signs of high functioning anxiety.
Warning Signs of High Functioning Anxiety
1. You have a stoic, calm demeanour.
Wait, what? Aren’t anxious people supposed be a vibrating bundle of nerves? Not necessarily. If you have high functioning anxiety, you’ve learned to wear a mask of calm by stuffing down and compartmentalizing your emotions. You’ve perfected hiding your emotions so well that people often tell you you’re stoic and hard to read.
2. You’re an achievement fiend.
People typically expect someone with anxiety to be unmotivated. But when you have high functioning anxiety, you actually use your anxious feelings to push you to achieve your goals. The problem is, it’s never enough. You always feel like you should be doing more.
3. You’re a perfectionist.
Geez, this list is starting to sound like the weaknesses-that-are-really-strengths you describe during a job interview. Perfectionism tends to be seen as a positive quality. But it can often be a coping mechanism for high functioning anxiety.
You try to calm your worries by obsessively perfecting your work and appearance, or becoming a self-help addict. You also have an ‘all or nothing mentality’ that leads you to take things to extremes. As millennials would say, “you’re so extra”.
4. You crave control.
I don’t mean in the power-hungry, gotta-call-all-the-shots sense. If you struggle with high functioning anxiety, you likely feel an intense need to control most aspects of your environment, such as your living space, what you eat, your routines, and who you allow into your bubble.
5. You keep your world small.
Do you shrink your world to prevent overwhelm? This is another sign of high functioning anxiety. You avoid situations that trigger your anxiety, such as social events, travel, confrontation, or anything else that creates intense emotional discomfort. You tend to stick to familiar experiences and routines that give you a sense of control and comfort.
6. You use a lot of negative self-talk.
When you have high functioning anxiety, your mind is filled with negative self-talk. Your internal dialogue is so dark that it makes HBO look like a kids network. You criticize yourself for falling short of perfectionism, and take inventory of every flaw with cruel precision.
7. You have nervous habits.
Though you can come off as composed and put together in public, the one thing that might give your high functioning anxiety away is your nervous habits: face picking, foot tapping, scalp scratching, nail biting, key jiggling—these are all subtle ways that you express your secret anxiety.
8. You can’t sleep.
No surprises here. When your mind is full of anxious thoughts, it’s pretty hard to get a good night’s sleep. You lie awake worrying and obsessing until even the sheep you planned to count grow weary and call it a night.
9. You are a people pleaser.
If you have high functioning anxiety, the word ‘no’ is not a part of your vocabulary. The thought of displeasing someone and potentially pushing them away makes your anxiety levels soar. So you try your best to make everyone happy—even if it means you just barely cling to your own sanity.
10. You need to stay busy.
This is another sneaky characteristic of high functioning anxiety. Far from being ‘crippling’, your brand of anxiety actually propels you to be in a state of constant doing. You know that the moment you stop, those anxious feelings will creep in, so you focus on staying busy with work, errands, hobbies, and taking care of others.
If you you’re an introvert who struggles with anxiety, be sure to get my free introvert confidence lessons and connection guide. Get the guide and lessons here.
Over to you
Do you struggle with high functioning anxiety? I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences in the comments below! 🙂
Love,
I see some of the characteristics in my self
When things go wrong I tend to think what can I do even if there is nothing to do !
But beat myself up because of the fact I can’t do anything
I also think because you don’t show or deal with the anxiety because you must be calm and do, your health can be impacted much sooner than someone who lets out the anxiety
Being an intervert can sometime be baffling!
O.
M.
G.
Spot on, Michaela.
Same here. You just described me to a T.
Me three.
D.I.T.T.O!
I can never say when I’m anxious because I don’t show nervous signs like most people do. I’m not able to say I’m anxious, I always look relaxed, I just talk a little less but no one can actually see how anxious I am. I can’t even tell it. With the years, I have noticed some signs that are particularly obvious to me that I’m having a break down: I get dizzy, I have IBS, I don’t feel like eating, I feel guilty of practicing my instruments (because I should be studying for uni), every problem sounds like the end of the world, I stop talking, I can’t sleep… It’s hard because I haven’t found yet a way to calm down. I always find myself being overly anxious when it’s too late for any remedy…
Wow, you nailed me 10 for 10. I’m an off the scale ISTJ. The internal monologue is the worst part. It makes it really hard to focus.
I’m also an ISTJ, and 3,4,5,6 & 10 would describe me, with 2 & 8 joining in at times. I think the anxiety stems from the fact that Introverted intuition (Ni) is our 8th function. (Some in the MBTI space refer to the 8th function as an individual’s “demon” function.)
Spotone every one of them
Sounds a lot like ASD.
as an Aspie who is also ISTJ, I agree!
I used to think I wasn’t anxious, I appear very calm most of the time (as an INTJ). My score above is probably 8/10, though. And my body system quietly displays the truth, even though my mind would like to think otherwise: Teeth clinching, trouble relaxing, nervous habits, etc. A nutritionist has given me some good advice that helps: reduce caffeine (I’m sensitive to it, and usually have just one cup of half decaf in the morning); eliminate sugar -so important. We need to carefully read ingredients, some form of sugar is in most every packaged food. And for the last 7 years I’ve also eliminated gluten (and temporarily, most grains). Basically, good health really helps with my anxiousness. One more thing: prayer -getting the focus off of me.
I couldn’t agree more, Ruthie! I’m also extremely sensitive to all stimulants and most allergens, like wheat and dairy. I talk about it in this article:https://introvertspring.com/best-introvert-diet/
Amen. Prayer definition helps.
And I hate autocorrect. definition = definitely
Spot on, Michaela!
Thanks for another great article. Enjoy the rest of your trip!
I can see myself having a lot of these traits. I knew I had anxiety but its more difficult for others to see this in me.
Yes, this is my world and it is exhausting. Been fortunate to have been not working the past eleven months, but will, by necessity, have to return to at least part time working soon. So will have to put on my high-functioning anxiety facade again. Ugh.
Everyone tells me how organised and amazing I am! I want to tell them if they woke up with the Silent Scream (you know the artwork I’m talking about) going off in their head, they too would be highly motivated to get all their work done.
It is an effective strategy for everything apart from my peace of mind…
Spot on! Some people think I’m not anxious because they don’t see it on the outside, but I’m definitely feeling it on the inside. Also, because I’m highly sensitive, I have to work to make my world less overwhelming (not always easy).
Ok, so I re-wrote this about 4 times. I don’t struggle with it. I live in it. The only one that really doesn’t apply to me is #8. I have no problem falling asleep, and staying asleep. In fact, on the weekends, I can easily sleep past 10am. I am normally a morning person by choice (not nature) because I want to get stuff done (see #10 – I guess). Also, I purposely don’t worry – doing so is wasted energy.
Also, specifically on #10, I initially thought that only applied to work-life. I can’t stand being bored. If I find myself getting bored, I’ll find things to do. However, as I was working through the message that #10 didn’t apply to me after work, I started to remember that I bring a lot of work home and am frequently checking my work email.
Hmmm, stupid mirror, too reflective… Well, eerily accurate.
This is me as well 10/10… as I’m tapping my foot and swirling my pen around, fighting off negative self talk because it’s been an insanely stressful day after a very stressful week last week.
Keeping my world small is the one that surprised me – I’m sure there are many reasons to keep my world small, but to avoid overwhelm is certainly one of them!
i just read this and started sobbing. i can’t believe i thought i was doing better “managing” my anxiety!
That’s so me except I try to avoid being too busy as I just get more stressed and anxious when I feel like I’ve got too much happening, I like to keep my life simple where possible. Wish I could find the switch to turn off my overactive brain that never stops worrying! I hide my anxiety really well, I’ve always thought I should have been an actor because other people have no idea of the turmoil inside me when I get stressed. This week I’m trying clinical hypnotherapy and also meditation classes to try and calm my brain, I’m tired of being on an emotional rollercoaster!!
Yes Michaela you’ve done it again ! Hit it right on the nose ! For me, a strong INTJ, I get 9 out of 10. I don’t seem to need to keep busy, unless you count watching endless reruns of L & O ; or reading incessantly, or going on Amazon to buy more books so that I can read more. If these count then I am 10 for 10. I do make real efforts to control my face, arms, skin and scalp picking(#7) and negative thinking (#6) but the other 8 characteristics pretty much run my life !
Wow, I have never felt so identified in my life. Hit the mark on all of them, except that sometimes I do have my moments of sleep, but generally sleep around 4-5 a day, but stay six on bed (lol). Your posts are spot on on the way I feel, wish to meet you some day Michaela.
Oh god. I never knew I’m actually a HFI! I gotta learn how to not let them take full control over me and learn how to relax. Thanks for sharing these Michaela.
Hi Michaela, I had a lot of these when younger.
Some things still show up when I get anxious like foot tapping and lack of sleep.
#9 If someone isn’t allowed to people please to avoid pushing others away, then would they kind of get their feelings hurt and either fade or push others away?
I’m really self sufficient and not much of a people pleaser, I’m busy filling my own needs and taking care of me. I think that puts a lot of people off. Every once in awhile I’ll add immense value to others in a big way yet it’s not an everyday thing.
I have all 10 signs of High Functioning Anxiety. I confess that I do think negative thoughts and I am really afraid of failure and not understanding things. It is exhausting. I am an INFJ personality type.
I didn’t know there was such thing but it pretty well sums me up! Although I don’t say negative things about myself (something that is intentional and I’ve had to teach myself!). People think I don’t have much emotion as I control my emotions very well! But internally I am extremely emotional! I didn’t think I was a “perfectionist” but had an “aha” moment when I realized I am an extreme perfectionist when it comes to my appearance! I need routine in my life and hate chaos! I didn’t think I had any nervous habits until it dawned on me that I incesssantly bite my lip and touch my neck! Anyway this was an eye opener and an interesting read… I learned something about myself I never knew!
This is me – 99%! Well, 99% because 1 isn’t entirely me. When I’m scared or angry, I can’t really hide them (hello 7!) and I can “hulk out” when put under extreme pressure.
All of the other apply to me to a T. At the moment, I struggle with 8. I’ve lost my job recently, which leads me to 2, 3, 4, 6, 8 and 10. They were already there when I had my job but being a jobseeker has made things worse and 9 might come in action. I really wish I could without 9, because I’m very individualistic and really hate to compromise my identity and ideals for a monthly cheque – I’m an INFP, by the way. I can accept other people for what they are but always have the feeling it’s not reciprocated.
I’ve been told to take a break and relax before seeking another job – I’ve spent a lot of time writing, journaling, running/working out and reading your blog 😉 but I’ve trouble sleeping for a week and am always restless. I need to find another way (meditation doesn’t really work for me either :\)
Keep up the blog, Michaela <3
Wow! As already stated, SPOT ON!
So, my question is how to treat/deal with High Functioning Anxiety?
I found that for sleep, a weighted blanket has changed my life. For other traits I think it depends on the individual. I’m on half of the lowest dose of an anti anxiety, I feel best when I eat leafy greens and legumes (I recently made the move to full vegan and feel amazing) and I practice yoga and meditation. Even though I’m an introvert I also find it incredibly important to keep up connection with others, so I try to make sure I’m getting regular small group interactions. All of this has really helped me, I hope some of it does for you as well!
I am definitely 9 out of 10.
I used to be 10 out of 10, but I’ve done a lot of work things n the negative self talk. Otherwise yep. I am super high functioning super high anxiety.
I can relate to all, except #9 not so much, I feel it’s easier to say”no”,most of the time… I guess for me, it’s harder to say”no” to family members at times
Question for Michaela, to what extent can this cross over to become compulsion? As in Obsessive compulsive? My counselor told me that Ocd stems from anxiety and need for control.
Hi Sara, that is a good question for your counselor. I’m not sure.
Yep, that’s it. Except for the self destructive boil overs on that stoic demeanor. And even they are only the tip of the iceberg. Folks can easily “take it away” by focusing on the one thing that caused the boil over. Completely insensitive to how “stuffed” you are with other things. So you’re made “wrong” and retreat back to stoic and damage control.
I’ve had Generalized Anxiety Disorder all my life and I have all these signs except 9. I have reached a point where I don’t really care what people think of me unless they’re my family and my few friends.
Spot on. ISTJ here. It’s a struggle, but I try to keep to positive.
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I related to nearly all of this article but never thought of myself that way, I know I suffer from anxiety and stress and introverted – is there a LOW functioning Anxiety??