INFJ idealist

Most INFJs have an idealistic view on the world. Not only do we notice everything, but we also see it through the eyes of an idealist. However, this is not an advantage all the time. In some instances, it can be a huge struggle for INFJs to perceive the world as we do. It can be pretty overwhelming actually.

Seeing the world through the eyes of an INFJ

Those of you who have followed me for some time and read my articles know that I’m a hardcore idealist. No matter what bad things are happening in the outside world, I’m an eternal believer that good always prevails. Which is why I sometimes face an inner struggle only INFJs understand.

Because I see the world through the eyes of an idealist, I’m more likely to feel disappointed by the actions of others. If I see someone asking for food on the street (this is what happened yesterday), my immediate reaction is to go to the nearest bakery and buy a couple of meals. But not everyone thinks like that.

Also, being a protector, I believe that everyone is good and kind by default. This way of thinking caused me many sleepless nights when facing reality. As much as I love my idealistic INFJ nature, it gives me headaches sometimes.

That’s why I’ll share 3 main struggles an INFJ idealist faces, and hope they will help you better understand this phenomenon that is unique to INFJs.

3 struggles of the INFJ idealist

1. We see the world how we are.

I deliberately put this as a struggle because not everyone has your heart my INFJ friend. Few do, actually. When we look on external events and people, we create this idealistic trait that often makes us feel lonely and misunderstood. Our eyes see all, but they also cry a lot when they do.

2. Loneliness is amplified tenfold.

INFJs already feel lonely as it is. So, when you expect others to have the same levels of empathy and desire for feedback as you do, the result can be terrible. Our personality is prone to anxiety, and to a feeling you’re probably all too familiar with: Not belonging anywhere. Our loneliness is increased to a level where even the support of our loved ones is disregarded.

3. Withdrawing into isolation.

Don’t get me wrong, we love our alone time as all introverts do. But when our inner INFJ idealist feels upset by everything wrong going on around us, withdrawing to an unhealthy isolation as a protection becomes all too real. Our communication is reduced to a bare minimum, and we lose the will interact with people all together.

All the struggles I wrote here, as scary as they may sound, are real for the rarest personality type. But that doesn’t mean they are permanent. You can overcome them.

Being an INFJ idealist is a gift, not a curse

No matter how many times you feel disappointed or saddened by what you notice, every emotion is better than indifference. I always say that I would rather feel all the sadness of this world and experience happiness afterwards, than not feel anything at all.

It’s not in our INFJ nature not to be idealists. Regardless of how much sh*t is happening, you keep being you. There is enough negativity as it is, so be the one who will spread that sparkle of positivity. You will be outnumbered, but hey, quality over quantity, right? J

If you ever hear that being an INFJ idealist is a curse, remember this:

It takes only a small ray of light to pierce a well of darkness.

Keep shinning my dear INFJs, even when it’s hard and challenging. You won’t have the support of everyone, but that’s okay, we don’t like big crowds anyway. 😉

A Safe Space for all INFJs

We understand how difficult it can be to be an idealist. This is exactly why there’s an entire community of INFJs here waiting for you to sign up!

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Are you an INFJ idealist too?

How does this make you feel? I would love to hear your experience with this! Feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section below.



Marko Kircanski INFJ coaching