My best advice for introverts who don’t know what to say?
Settle into the quiet bliss of observing and listening. Relax into your own body and know that it’s okay to just stand there, creating worlds with your mind.
Take comfort in your silence. Relish it. Let the whole world wait in hungry anticipation for your words to form. There’s no hurry. You have nothing to prove to anyone, but yourself.
Quiet confidence is sexy
Know that quiet confidence is compelling. It’s sexy. It is such a rare thing in this world to find someone who is not trying to impress. Or be liked. Or fill empty air space with mindless chatter. A person who is completely, unapologetically okay with who she is, and what she feels, is incredibly alluring.
You are a silent lighthouse
“Lighthouses don’t go running all over an island looking for boats to save; they just stand there shining.”~ Anne Lamott
Be like a lighthouse, shining silently for anyone who cares to seek you. Not everyone will notice your light. Not everyone will look for it. But the right people will find you.
The power of quiet
You can be strong, courageous and even brazen in your quietness. Or you can be soft, and kind. Your eyes can convey frightening resolve, or tender compassion.
Be inspired by the story of Diego Rivera and Frida Kahlo’s first encounter (they later fell in love and had an epic, tumultuous marriage). A young Frida was watching Diego paint, when his jealous wife, Lupe, began insulting her:
“She sat down and watched me silently, her eyes riveted on every move of my paintbrush. After a few hours, Lupe’s jealousy was aroused, and she began to insult the girl. But the girl paid no attention to her. This, of course, enraged Lupe the more. Hands on hips, Lupe walked toward the girl and confronted her belligerently. The girl merely stiffened and returned Lupe’s stare without a word.
Visibly amazed, Lupe glared at her a long time, then smiled, and in a tone of grudging admiration, said to me, ‘Look at that girl! Small as she is, she does not fear a tall, strong woman like me. I really like her.’”
~Diego Rivera, My Art, My Life: An Autobiography
Frida’s quiet resolve so thoroughly disarmed Diego’s jealous wife that her anger was transformed into admiration.
Such is the power of quiet courage.
Your story without words
Our words do not carry the message of who we are; our whole body is drenched with our story. We convey entire chapters with a subtle glance, a grin, the curve of our back.
So if your words get caught in your throat, swallow them. You’ve already told a thousand stories without ever opening your mouth.
More ways to be quietly captivating
We may be quiet, but introverts can be just as confident and charismatic as extroverts. The problem is that we’ve been going about it the wrong way. There is an introverted path to charisma – no extroversion required (thank goodness!).
Get my FREE Introvert Charisma Blueprint and develop true confidence, self-love & connection in your own innie way. You’ll also get my 50-page Introvert Connection Guide to go from meet and greet to meaningful friendships, even if you’re quiet and shy.