“I care not what others think of what I do, but I care very much about what I think of what I do! That is character!” ~Theodore Roosevelt
The 20th century marked a shift in how people formed their identity in the world. Suddenly, having a likeable personality was more important than qualities like integrity, good morals and citizenship.
Put simply, character was overshadowed by charisma.
Today, society remains preoccupied with charisma. Being magnetic and charming often trumps having true character. This is most evident in Hollywood and politics, but can be seen in every social arena.
It is common for people with questionable morals and no integrity to win favor with the masses. Simply being likeable can get a person very far in this world.
For introverts especially, this is a troubling phenomenon. We are often discounted because we don’t have the forceful presence of a more charismatic person. Our quieter virtues are outshined by the dazzling charm of someone with a big personality.
We all know people who promise the world, but never deliver. We’ve worked with a guy who didn’t pull his weight. We’ve been shocked by someone’s lack of integrity.
What is troubling about many of these people is that they are rewarded despite their lack of character. The smooth-talker gets laid. The gregarious slacker gets a promotion. The backstabbing beauty queen wins the crown. The moral of the story: others will overlook a host of despicable qualities if someone is charming and likeable.
As introverts, we might wish we were sprinkled with a tad bit more charisma dust. We see the perks of having this attractive quality and can’t help but covet it. But in doing so, we downplay our greatest assets.
We forget that true character goes to the core of who we are – well beyond the superficial space that charisma inhabits. It is one of the few things in this world that can’t be taken away from us. Charisma might get you a free drink and some phony friends, but developing character will get you what money can’t buy: self-respect, fulfillment and purpose.
So, screw what the rest of the world thinks. I’ll take character over charisma any day.
Relate completely! Love your writing style
You have said all what i have ever felt
How about having it both?I do think life is not about only dark and white,there are many shades of grey.Of course,having charisma without character it’s disuastruous,for others,but for the individual itself.Charisma,used the right way,could be one of the most succesful ways to positively influence the world around you.Think about Adolf Hitler and Mahatma Gandhi.Both had charisma.But one had no character whatsoever,other was basically a saint,People fall somewhere in the middle.What i am trying to say?Charisma ain’t bad.Charisma without character it’s very bad.But character without charisma is bland.And without power.Think about a person with character and charisma like a person with power for goodness.We weren’t born in this world to be passangers,you know.We were born to be significant.This are my two cents.
You know what? I like character instead of charisma just as I like bland people instead exciting ones.
Very well said! I felt as though you could read my mind and heart. Many times I’ve been in this situation and it hurt. I felt as though the world was against me and that I am doomed into a life of unfair treatment. I know the same things will happen again and it’s beyond of my control. But I am still hopeful that what is meant for me will find its way, that instead of trying to change who I am I should be more of who I am instead so the right opportunities and people can find me more easily. My heart goes out to all my fellow innies!