Most introverts are accustomed to others making incorrect assumptions about what introversion actually is. When we tell people that we are introverted, we often hear things like:
“Oh, so you’re shy?”
“But if you’re an introvert, shouldn’t you be at home by yourself right now?”
Umm … I said introvert, not hermit.
“So, is this hard for you then – being out in public and talking to people?”
Even though I’m cringing inside when I hear these things, I rarely show how much such comments irritate the heck out of me. I try to be understanding because I know that whoever I’m talking to has simply been misinformed about introversion. They don’t know what they don’t know. And it’s my job to set the record straight.
In person, I do this in a very gentle, concise sort of way. I patiently explain that introverts are not necessarily shy or anti-social, they simply need more time alone to recharge.
BUT since this is the magical land of the Internet, and this is my very own introvert blog, I’m going to set the record straight in a not-so-gentle or patient way.
Here we go.
We’re not socially inept!
Just because someone says that they are introverted, doesn’t mean that they are socially inept. In fact, most introverts have a very high EQ (emotional intelligence) level thanks to our observant and reflective nature. We understand social expectations and pleasantries, but we might not indulge in them at times because we find them cumbersome and draining.
Introversion and shyness are NOT the same thing
Not all introverts are shy. I’ve said this so many times before, but people just don’t seem to get it. Shyness has to do with a fear of social interactions. Both introverts and extroverts can be shy – just like both introverts and extroverts can be confident and assertive. It’s time for people to stop assuming that all introverts are timid little hermits.
Introverts have influence
Fame, success and respect are not reserved for extroverts. There are plenty of influential and famous introverts in this world. We can be go-getters, too, you know. We’re not all just sitting at home playing Dungeons and Dragons, while life passes us by. Here is a short list of famous and influential introverts:
And many more!
Extroversion is the only way to success
Introverts don’t need to become more extroverted in order to be successful. We’re fine the way we are. Stop trying to help us by showing us the enlightened extroverted way. We’re tired of denying our innate needs and desires in order to live up to the extrovert ideal of normal. Our normal looks different than an extrovert’s. And that’s okay.
“Introverts don’t need to become more extroverted in order to be successful. We’re fine the way we are. Stop trying to help us by showing us the enlightened extroverted way. ” I have a friend like that now, at first I didn’t get it because I haven’t had someone do that to me since I was in elementary. Now, it just irritates me because I find it insulting, she looks at me with these sympathetic eyes. When I told her about the fun I have taking Drama classes she asked me isn’t that hard for me because I’m so reserved. The thing is she is a new student, so it’s kind of like, “Honey, you don’t know me”. She’s a really friendly nice person, that’s just trying to help but I don’t need saving. I enjoy talking to her because she actually listens to what you’re saying.nBack when I was younger and confused, maybe that was cute but going into my 4th year of highschool I’m much more confident in myself. I don’t want to be seen as a lost puppy looking for a home. I remember reading a bit about introverts before but it didn’t sink in, but before I saw this site I was already just like, “Forget it, I’m not going to a bunch of dumb parties anymore, or hanging out with a bunch of people I don’t even like. I don’t need that many friends esp. those that make me feel bad. Ill do what I want this year” and I met some wonderful friends this year by not denying who I am and my introvert needs. But it is hard being an introvert in a boarding school because the afterschool activities don’t stop, so I may have gone a little overboard in order to get some freedom. Next year I’ll have to learn more balance. But how do I tell her, I don’t need to be “saved”?