Many introverts will be single and alone over the holidays.
It’s one thing to not have a partner to share the holidays with, but to be separated from friends and family, too, is not an easy pill to swallow.
Here in Ottawa, Canada, they just announced that we will being going into another major lockdown on Christmas Eve.
As I scrolled my Facebook feed shortly after the announcement, I saw one friend write:
“It’s looking like this will be the first Christmas ever that I’ll be spending totally alone. 😭🥺”
I know that many others face the same reality, single and so very alone on Christmas.
In some ways, introverts might handle this better than extroverts, however, we’re still human.
We still long for the warmth of our family during the holidays.
If you’re like me, the Christmas season is a time when you fantasize about Hallmark-style gatherings full of good food, laughter, and cheer.
Even if our dysfunctional family gatherings never measured up to the fantasy, at least there was some hope of connection.
After all, real connection is what we introverts truly want during this season.
Most of us find the commercialism and busyness of the holidays overwhelming. But we enjoy sharing a laugh with our siblings, and seeing the little ones light up with excitement.
When I was a kid Christmas day meant waking up to stockings filled with little gifts that would be a total bummer on their own, yet somehow lit up our hearts when stuffed into a red velvet stocking: socks, candy canes, a calculator, books I’d never read.
Later in the day, extended family would come over to graze on Value brand cheddar cheese and green olives, as they told my brothers and I how much we’d grown.
Then we’d all sit awkwardly and wait for a feast of dry turkey and fixings. Not exactly the Hallmark Christmas I imagined.
But sometimes there was laughter. Always, there was the sense of belonging to a tribe.
This year my family won’t be gathering.
I’m fortunate to have a good friend in my bubble with whom I will have a lazy Christmas of movie watching and cookie decorating.
It won’t be the same as Christmases past, but we will make the most of it.
I suppose this is the only advice I can offer to introverts who will be spending the holidays alone, or nearly so.
Accept that this year won’t be the same as years past. This may be sad, but also freeing.
You can do whatever you like. Treat yourself, indulge, cry your eyes out if that’s what you want to do.
Cook or order something delicious and curl up with a good book or magazine. You can also watch a favorite movie from your childhood (I’ll be watching Gremlins).
If nothing else, take comfort in the fact that the New Year is nearly here. And that means 2020 is finally coming to an end. Thank God.
P.S. If you’re new to the blog, allow me to introduce myself. I’m Michaela Chung, author of The Irresistible Introvert and The Year of The Introvert, and creator of this amazing innie community we have here. For several years, I’ve been building up a labyrinth of introvert resources that will take you on a magical journey toward more confidence, connection, and self-love. Start with this free Introvert Connection Guide.