introvert at party

Introverts are awesome people who need more alone time to recharge and feel at our best. We can be social, but often feel overwhelmed at parties. Seeing an introvert at a party is like seeing a deer in the city. We may look out of our element, but we’re still pretty damn majestic. That said, here are 11 crazy relatable things introverts do at parties.

1. Making the small talk stank face

Introverts are known for our resting bitch face. Often, our furled brow is just our default thinking face. But catch us in the midst of a superficial conversation at a party and you’ll see a look of utter disdain. We just can’t hide our hatred of small talk.

2. Being oh so helpful to the host

Introverts are a party host’s dream, because we’re the ones who help clean up. Little do they know that our helpfulness is just a sneaky way to avoid socializing for a while.

3. Fantasizing about home

If you see an introvert zoning out at a party, chances are we’re lost in a fantasy world. Often, those fantasies include thoughts about home sweet home: our cozy bed and all the books we’ll read in it when we’re alone again; our laptop and all the wondrous adventures of the mind it will take us on; our couch and the way it will cradle us back to life after a draining night out.

4. Trying to look nice, but not too nice

We introverts have to strike a fine balance between appearing friendly, but also putting on our invisibility cloak when necessary. When our social batteries are dangerously low, we do our best to send off “don’t talk to me” vibes. Meanwhile, we also try to convey that we’re not assholes, we’re just tired.

5. Sticking with an extrovert sidekick

Sometimes the only way to endure a party is to piggyback off the endless energy of a social butterfly. We stay close to an extrovert bestie as a means of survival. They do the heavy lifting of meet and greet while we sit back and enjoy the ride.

6. Making friends…with animals

If there is a pet within sight at a party, the introverts in the room will flock to it. After all, introverts love our animal friends. They never ask us why we’re quiet. Or talk ad nauseam about the weather. Animals are a great source of comfort when introverts are feeling overwhelmed at a party.

7. Looking for the other introverts

Introverts are drawn to other innies at parties. But there’s a problem. What does an introvert say to a fellow introvert who hates small talk? Don’t worry, the 7 steps in my Introvert Connection Guide shows you how to connect with anyone (even other quiet introverts), without overwhelm. Get the free guide here.

8. Going to the bathroom to recharge

When introverts are stuck at a party with no escape in sight, the bathroom can feel like the ultimate refuge. It may not be the most elegant of surroundings, but it has a door that locks. It gives us a few moments of quiet to recharge.

9. Looking at your phone to hide awkwardness

Have you ever resorted to looking at your phone to hide how painfully awkward you feel at a party? Join the club. For introverts, a smart phone is like a little piece of home that we cling to for comfort when we don’t know what the hell to do with our hands (or the rest of our body, for that matter).

10. Worrying that you’re too boring

Because introverts are often misunderstood and chastised for our quietness, we worry that we’re too boring. Even if we want to connect at parties, we let our fear that we’re not interesting enough get in the way.

11. Leaving early

We came, we saw, we left—really, really early. The thing is, parties are meant to be ‘fun’. But much of the time, introverts have way more fun when we’re alone than at crowded gatherings. Also, socializing is insanely draining for us quiet types. We’re like introverted Cinderellas who need to be home by midnight before our social energy disappears.

I hope you could relate to what I shared. Unfortunately, this time of year, parties are inescapable. Download my free Introvert Party Survival Guide to make it through the madness.

Over to you

What do you do to survive parties as an introvert? Please do share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below. I’d love to hear from you. 🙂



Michaela Chung


P.S. In case you’re new here, allow me to introduce myself. I’m Michaela, creator of this site and author of the book The Irresistible Introvert. I help introverts like us develop confidence and connections on our own blissfully introverted terms. I invite you to stick around and read some more articles.