How do you make an introvert fall in love? If you’re reading this article, you might already know that it’s not so straightforward.
Introverts are an anomaly to many because we don’t wear our emotions on our sleeve. We keep our greatest treasures hidden, secretly hoping that the right person will have the map to unlock the gates to our heart.
I have the map, dearest.
Today I’m sharing 8 ways to make an introvert fall in love. Follow these tips to a T and the gentle heart of an introvert will be yours to cherish. Handle it with care, because an introvert’s love and loyalty is not easy to win. But trust me, it is worth the effort!
8 Ways To Make an Introvert Fall in Love
1. Listen
Just because we’re quiet, doesn’t mean introverts have nothing to say. We may be word economists, but we put a lot of thought into what we do share. That’s why we really appreciate it when our partner listens on a deep level.
Feeling rushed in conversation can be really stressful for introverts, who need more time to think before we speak. Avoid interrupting us, and leave some empty spaces in the conversation so that we can process our thoughts. Try waiting a couple of seconds after we finish our sentence before chiming in.
If you or someone else interrupts your innie mid-sentence, be sure to invite him to finish his thought once the distraction has passed. Trust me when I say that he has been secretly hoping for such an invitation, and will be very impressed and grateful for the gesture.
If you really want to make an introvert fall in love, acknowledge what she says through paraphrasing, and affirming statements: “I really liked what you said about xyz, it shows that you’re perceptive.”
2. Don’t be too needy
Nothing makes an introvert’s anxiety levels rise like being needed too much. It’s important that we know that our partner will give us space to wander and ponder.
Needy people threaten an introvert’s independence. We worry that we will lose ourselves in the relationship. We’ll be totally engulfed by your needs, and we won’t have anything left for ourselves. For sensitive introverts, who are already susceptible to overwhelm, a needy partner can be beyond exhausting.
If you want to make an introvert fall in love, show her that you have your own hobbies, friends, and passions, and you don’t expect her to fill all the empty spaces of your existence.
3. Be patient
You might be tempted to speed things along with an introvert by getting pushy. Don’t. Introverts need more time to open up than extroverts. We want to feel like the person we are with will give us the space and time we need to process our feelings.
If you try to force intimacy (both physical and emotional) too quickly, you risk pushing your introvert away. Paradoxically, you can make an introvert fall in love much more quickly when you patiently allow him to open up in his own due time.
4. Be honest and real
Introverts tend to be highly perceptive. We can spot a fake from a mile away, so you might as well be honest from the get-go. Not only that.
Being around people who are open and real makes us feel like we can be ourselves. So, show your flaws, nerd out, get your goofy on – this is the secret to make an introvert fall in love.
5. Be curious
Every introvert has a burning desire to be understood. If you really want to ignite our love, get curious about who we are beyond the surface: our values, opinions, passions, desires.
We introverts have a secret world of ideas and dreams that we want to share with the right person. Gently invite us to open up by asking specific questions, and truly listening to the answers.
But be careful not to turn the conversation into an interrogation. Weave in your own stories and insights so that your innie doesn’t feel too put on the spot. At the same time, be on the lookout for subtle cues that an introvert likes you.
6. Slow down
Introverts tend to move at a slower pace than extroverts. We don’t like to stuff our day with endless activities. We need time to slow down and reflect on our experiences.
Try not to overschedule your introvert. Leave space in the day to do nothing, have a cuddle, take a nap, lie in the grass, and look at the clouds. Allow her to just be for a while. She will appreciate the slower pace, and it will bring out the best in her.
7. Be comfortable with silence
Conversation can be exhausting for introverts, even if we like you. When we go silent, it is not necessarily an invitation for you to fill the empty air space with chatter.
Sometimes, we don’t want to speak or listen. We just want to sit in silence and know that there is nothing awkward about it. Give us the space to do so by embracing the quiet moments, instead of anxiously trying to obliterate them with words.
8. Be loyal
Introverts value loyalty in friends and lovers. We are super selective about whom we allow into our inner circle, so we expect our companions to be loyal and trustworthy. We want to know that we can trust you with the precious gifts we give you.
Will you stick by us, keep our secrets, and cherish our friendship? If so, we will be fiercely loyal to you in return.
I hope you found my little roadmap to make an introvert fall in love helpful! Remember to use these tips with care. An introvert’s heart is not something to be toyed with, after all!
Have a specific question?
If you have specific questions about an introvert you’re swooning over, please do ask away in the comments below. 🙂 And if you really want to get inside the mind of an introvert, subscribe to my mailing list, where I share secrets I never post on the blog.
Xo,
Enjoyed your points, and I DO believe that these points are for everyone who wants to be loved and respected. It’s a good thing.
Extroverts may speak quickly and so need to backtrack and fix things up…
TIME
LOVE
RESPECT
Thanks for your insights Antoinita! 🙂
Very helpful will definitely check out more of your articles. Currently getting to know an extremely introverted woman. I’m head over heels for her but made the mistake of number 3, thankfully she forgave me. It’s definitely a process but well worth the effort. I’m looking forward to learning everything about her.
I ‘ve being dating a introvert for close to two years and doing exactly the opposite with out a clue ooh my God what have I done I can’t afford to lose her I need a mirracle
Well, I have a question that how to start conversation with an introvet .
I matched with an introvert on tinder. We were talking non stop thru text for 2 days and had a chance to hang out one evening. I did not plan on hooking up but things went in that direction. I went home and messaged her the next day and she did not reply. Is this apart of them being an introvert? Does she need time to process her feelings to see if I’m really down for her or if I just wanted that one thing? I am going to give it time before contacting her again I just don’t want to loose her because she was really cool.
Thanks
Hi i have a crush but i dont know his name he also introvete and he is doctor i want him to fall in love with me and bc he is introvert so its really hard to talk with him so plz give me a advise
I’m crazy about a 44yr old female introvert I am 56, we both live in a small town and cross paths a couple times a month, I asked her out 3 weeks ago and she turned me down in a text saying ‘Your sweet but I am not looking for a relationship with anyone at this time in my life, I wish you the best’ I was dejected by her response and since have talked to her brother on FB who told me ‘ you actually got her number? I said yes she texted me, he told me she’s super private and I do not know when the last time she was with someone? He also said ‘Dont give up on her’ and told me I will put a good word in for you at the right time, she lives only 4 blocks from me and I restrain myself from sending a text to her fearing I will upset her, what should I do? I really want to get to know her. CM.
Hey,
This Sagar I fall in love with introvert girl but she got dumped with one play boy.
I proposed her and she replied not interested.
Will you help in this matter as I love her truly.
Regards,
Sagar
Also stay calm and give them some time when they are stressed out.
I am getting in love with an introvert,two times she ignored me so i texted her than she replied me i don’t want to talk with anyone except my family so what should i do
You just say ok text me when you are ready .dont show signs of feeling rejection by it because if you stay patient you will one day become one of her important people .
My introvert ignores my messages won’t really text me? And says he needs lots of space. Doesn’t really show affection towards me anymore!!!
After one year relationship introvert said that he don’t love me ? At that time what we do ? Give them space for thinking of love ??
I really have the same issue, but then starting from long distance, for 6 months and 1,5 years together in person. (we broke up for longer then 6 months now. but i still love this introverted girl with my whole hart, while she is back in her own country)
I have a introvert friend and i truly like her but she use to think to much about each and everything and i have purpose her & she ask me why as boring as me so what should i answer to his question for this please help me out here
i am speaking thru wechat to a introverted woman i want to meet and desire a possible relationship with her. We have talked now for 5- months and i have not understood everything as i could. After reading this i understand way more now than i did before hand I am a loyal and loving guy and wish for us to actually make something from all this. i wear my heart on my sleeve and my feeling are true and warm. Its been difficult on me bcz i dont know her feelings as i share mine to her. It seems she is very reluctant to share. although she says she cares and want a possible future too. Im trying to get a good feel of how she thinks and reading your words have opened up a whole new perspective on the way i feel i need to share with her. Thank you for that !
There’s this introvert guy (I’m an extrovert) that I really find very attractive. But I just keep getting mixed signals from him, like one moment I catch him looking at me and then the next he’s avoiding me. And I don’t know if he is really bad at getting back with people or if he truly doesn’t want to text me because he will go awhile without responding and then he’ll randomly respond to my texts one day. I need some serious help because he is so hard to read and I don’t know what I’m doing,
I am in the same boat and I am DYING to know where you are at this point?? Sometimes he says things that I feel are clear signs he is interested, and then in a day or so, he just doesn’t reach out AT ALL. So when I suggest that maybe friendship is more than he can handle, that maybe he has a lot on his plate, he comes back with a negative, that things are fine and thanks for being his friend. I have NO Freaking Idea where I stand with him. I am not even sure that he is interested in me at all!!
Hlo mam…Its about one of my friend when we first started to talk he is really very expensive used to ask me how I am doing used to talk with me daily but after sometime he become weird…introvert type now he ever text me first he just want to be alone and alone I want him to open up with me but he 😑 I don’t know what’s going on in his mind please help me to make him open up with me again.
I think someone who has crush on me research about introvert he stalked my account.. lol He also quiet when we are together.. He research about my personality my goodness.. 😅😅
I have an introverted boyfriend & we live in different states. He has a lot of responsibilities in his line of work & often he needs to work for almost everyday. When we meet he’d always gave me lots of attention despite his business, but when we’re away he only messages me once in every 3 days & if he got sick or working non-stop, he’d go silence without contacting me for a few days. He also seems not comfortable through video calls so I only video called him once a week & we talked for less than 5 minutes. I’m really having a hard time to understand him, due to the fact that I’m an extroverted girlfriend. Please advice me on how to cope with this.
Been 3 weeks since I was turned down by a female introvert injf at our local pharmacy, strange thing is I can see her apartment from my front window, we live in a very small town…I will see her in a few days when I pick up my prescription though….she’s into art (oil paintings) and I even tried to get her to share a couple pics of her work….her response ‘I didn’t feel like sharing’ I very attracted to this woman and just don’t know what to do just trying to get to know her as she told she’s not looking to date anyone right now…she’s 44 I’m 56 ….clocks ticking…..🕜💘🥴
Very well-stated as usual, Michaela! Each suggestion spoke to me and was right on point. A treasure chest of goodies for an introvert’s love one for sure! Thank you.
Thank you Robert! 😀
I have crush on my introvert classmate since 3 years and everybody annoys us saying we love each other and I also find some similarities of her with your points regarding me. But, both of us aren’t able to propose or express our love for each other. We don’t really have regular conversation with each other but we look at each other and meet everyday. And as she doesn’t use any social media or cell phone, so I can’t meet her at anywhere except for school. We have been studying together since 6 years and I am a genuinly extrovert boy. So, how can I get her at this context as I am dying for her and I need her very soon.
I look forward for your reply.
Thank you,
Ishrak.
I fell in love with a introvert man that had his heart torn apart. I truly love this man with all my heart. He says he cares about me and text me good morning and good night everyday. Everytime it seems like we’re getting closer he pushes me away and says he just wants to be friends that he wants us to heal together and take things slow because everytime he cares about someone he gets hurt. He has very deep wounds and I don’t know how to get him to open his heart and except the love that I feel for him.
I’m going through exactly the same it drives me crazy , but for some reason I feel I have to stick with it after having horrible cheating and lying boyfriends in the past this man is a different breed & if he can get past his heartbreak I think I would have something wonderful with him , that I have never had with any other guy . So I think you should do the same be patient with him the rewards will be so worth it .
Same boat ladies. And I’d really like to know your status now, over 1 year later. I mean, is there Any point in me being patient? IS this going to go anywhere? or am I going to continue crying by myself once a week because I can’t seem to get a clear message from him if he even is attracted to me or wants to be with me or talk to me!
I cant even find a job, my extroverted friends girls loved, were rapeing me, and i dont understand flirting or have money, and i read that the whole world idolizes extroversion and so the counselors ask do i feel unhappy and i actually feel happy because they are the only people that barely talk to me and sometimes are cute girls but i am always disturbed by girls ideals around money even when they are super nice i wonder if they know what its like but i know they dont. They think i can just get a job or flirt, but actually i only know how to work hard. I cant even imagine enjoying a date, i want my 26 years of being fucked back, but girls dont even like big dick unless its going to pay them, and i am terrified of old ladies and all gay guys. What do i do everything i read makes me cry i have brain damage sorry huh..
If you “make” someone fall in love, is it really love. I think the 8 things simply allow love to develop if it is to be
Yes, it is more “helping” an introvert to fall in love, or “removing the obstacles”, but that didn’t fit so well in the title. 😉
Excellent summary…spot on! I’m definitely sharing this with my wife
I’m glad you agree, Wendell! I hope she takes the tips to heart. 🙂
Am inlove with an introvert,he goes quite ,no replying calls or texts ,he just calls or texts when he wants
Awesome. Just awesome (you/what you do/your advice, articles, musings, information). Thank you Michaela – can we award you an OBE for Services to Introverts (poss an IBE / Innie of the British Empire?)
So much of your writing, comments and observations are spot on – almost as if you knew me. I can’t wait to show this article to my (much more extrovert than me) fiancé 🙂 To be fair, he is brill and does understand a lot, it’s just you have an uncanny way of explaining things precisely as they are. Indeed I am so very grateful for how you have opened up my own eyes to my own Innie nature – sometimes things that I hadn’t realised or put into words for myself. Instead of (secretly) feeling ‘weird’ and ‘not like others/not like an extrovert ideal’ I have begun to proudly -also of course understatedly 😉 – celebrate my introverted nature. You and your approach: fun, sensitive, appealing, thoughtful, intelligent, well-researched -has played a big part in this. Thank you for doing what you do! It is SO incredibly important and appreciated by me/ us under-represented Innies. More Michaela Chungs in the world please!
Thank you so much for the lovely message, Hannah! I really appreciate your kind words, and I’m so happy my work is helping you to love and accept your innie beauty. 😉 xo
I have noticed my introverted crush gets comfortable when around my friend than when around me
How on earth can i make her love me
Hi Hannah…I agree with every word that you said. I so much appreciate all of Michaela’s thoughts. You complimented her and said everything I would like to say as well. Thank you!
Great insights (as usual)! I appreciated this blog especially since I am an introvert who is recently heartbroken from a ” breakup ” with another introvert (who I was hoping to start a relationship with). Your insights offer me some much needed understanding, comfort…and hope. Thanks much!
You’re welcome, Douglas! Glad the article offered some insight and hope. xo
Been 8 years patient! Lol
These points were right on target and I can relate to all of them! As an INFJ, the part about quality time, while giving your introvert time to just “be” and process was highly relatable. Also true that we will feel threatened if you are too needy and jeopardize our independence. One of the most important things for me is to be heard and understood by someone who takes the time to listen. This world gets too loud and so often our innie voices go unheard. Having someone you trust to open up to emotionally has no price tag.
Well said Angelica! Feeling heard and understood is extremely important to me, too. 🙂
Michaela! Girl why is this sooo spot on? You are pure amazement!
Thank you Meagan! <3
Spot on, Michaela!
Now, how do we find someone who will do this for us? :o)
And, how do we give back what they need?
Best,
Jan
Oh that is too complex a question to answer here, but I will say that understanding and embracing your true self is a huge step in the right direction. And then, of course,seeking to understand your partner will help you provide for his/her needs.
If I was ever at a loss for words in trying to explain my ideals to another, tgis articlewould be my voice. II do suggest reading it together with the article “Introvert Love – Let’s Be Single Together” it’s like strawberries and chocolate… they compliment each other.
Like stawberries and chocolate – I like that! Thanks, Waleed. 🙂
I am 54 & really didn’t discover my type till about 4 years ago, everything makes so much sense. I look at all my past relationships & see they all fell in love with that mask of extroversion. Knowing infj’s, I wonder if I will every find someone who accepts & loves me for who I truly am.
Hi , this article is so great ! I am a male , trying hard to win the heart of a girl that is an extrovert. It seems that there is no progress ! ? I always wonder if it is my fault ? To me, she does not know if there are two types of people. She is socially active. I always wonder if I should continue with the relationship , or just let go of her . Thanks for the article !! Learning so much and gaining confidence in myself ! Thanks a lot and continue to inspire us !!!
Hello!
My beautiful introverted man broke up with me awhile back. We were together for 16 months and I begain to wonder how he was feeling about me as he never said in words. I told him that I loved him and needed to feel wanted by him over text. The next time I saw him 2 days after I said we should talk and he told me he didn’t love me and left the key and left. He did say he really wanted to love me and that if he had a checklist list of the things he wants that I meet nearly all of those things. I said he didn’t have feelings for me but wanted to be friends if I could do that. Where did I go so wrong? How could he be with me for 16 months if he didn’t care about me?
Kristin, I pay more attention to his actions, not so much his words. Sounds to me like he got scared, not so much fell out of love. The going back to friends versus lovers thing is like saying “I don’t feel safe because to me love doesn’t feel safe, emotions scare me.” So through his actions he’s showing you he’s need to slow down, and take things much slower, introverts sometimes move slow when it comes to love. He cares, obviously so maybe if you try to understand his love language and do for him what he does for you, like quality time, maybe acts of service he’ll feel more comfortable with love. It sounds to me like your love language is quality time and words of affirmation. Sometimes introverts will when triggered, go back to start then do things over as to get them right the second time. If he was asking for friends, that’s what you were before being lovers, so do what you did in the beginning of your relationship and get him to fall back in love with you. Introverts don’t usually make big commitments like living together, if they are not in love or love someone, so this time be more conscious of what you did at the beginning of this stage, and move slower.
Hello! Awesome article there!
I loved these!
Can I pls ask if you can write some articles for being attractive, confident etc. and to impress a girl as an introverted guy? I mean hpthere r so many articles about being sensual, attractive introverted woman. But there arent for us guys XD
Anyways, thanks a lot for this website, I love Introvert Spring!
I am trying to understand my introvert boyfriend – who I love very much – and give him space as needed. But it just makes me crazy when he doesn’t contact me, especially when he doesnt respond to any of my texts. And even crazier when he “disappears” from our life.
Ive been totally upfront about how i feel when he does this to me. I actually even told him i didn’t like this behavior prior to him doing it to me due to being treated this way – by someone that started engaging in illegal activities and i think cheated on me.
All i ever ask (sometimes fight) for is for him to take 2 seconds to text me whats going to cause him to not be in touch or cancel plans. He says he will, understands, and is sorry – afterwards, when we talk in person and he is actively (pretending? Though i think honestly) showing me how much he loves me… Yet, as we are together longer these periods are getting worse/longer with the most recent leaving me truly hurt and maybe heartbroken.
Where is the line between needing space and ignoring me? Between needing alone time/time away from others or time away from me… pushing me away/not wanting to be with me?
Is it ok that he doesn’t respond to a thing i say when he needs “space” (and to only some of what i say on good times). He doesnt acknowledge or apologize for being mia and hurting me though I say im hurt. He may apologize finally in person but it’s pulling teeth to get him there
What is the difference between him surrendering and just agreeing to see me bc he doesn’t want conflict? Or seeing me bc he wants to?
When is lying about not wanting to see me ok? In my opinion never – I’ve caught him in 2 lies recently!
We were planning on moving in and eventually get married. How will that work when he pushes me away and doesnt talk to me… now for a week and a 1/2. ( he does write what I call automated messages.hi sweetheart have a nice day. But there is no conversation about what I’ve said or what’s going on with him, how i feel
Nothing)
I try so hard to be sensitive understanding and respectful for his need for space! But what about my feelings? My need for him (really needing – like car broke down, i was stranded, texted him but he didnt reply. Nor did he later acknowledge or even ask if im ok – Until I told him AGAIN in person (on the 1 night he saw me to avoid confrontation).
What should I do?
I feel I put in 95% effort and he puts 5%, maybe. What can/should he do to contribute to our relationship – other than making me feel rejected and treated poorly.
Is there a balance? How do we find it?
OR DOES HE JUST NOT LOVE ME AND WANT TO BE WITH ME BUT WON’T CONFRONT ME TO BREAK UP?
Btw, He has been rejected by many, and harshly by women, bc he has mile cerebral palsy. I dont see it as any reason to reject him. In fact it makes me love, admire and respect him more. Clearly it’s not an issue since its my last comment. But I do think it factors in.
HELP!
feeling CONFUSED, REJECTED AND OH SO VERY SAD
I could relate to each and every sentence of joneen. I am also in a relationship with an introvert. I am really not sure how do I handle him. I don’t know if I have to give him space and not speak, or I should speak to him more so taht he will be more comfortable. I am pained so much as I really love him n I don’t know his status as he doesn’t show up. Need your suggestion michaela. Thanks
I’m dating an introvert, sometimes becomes a little frustrating, just because I want to know and his slow pace frustrates me because I’m so forthcoming. But this is why I’m trying to understand him. And it also teaches me self discipline (time). Allowing our relationship to develop. Thanks for the tips
Hi there! I’m only 16 but I’ve had my eye on an introverted girl for a while! We went out for a couple of months about a year ago and we broke up because I was too needy and too fast and put too much of a spotlight on her at school. I’ve started talking to her more again in person and over text. Our common interest is acedemics and school. I drew her for secret santa and wondered what gifts your would recommend, I know her hobbies and stuff so could buy a themed present? How often should I text her and what topics should we talk about? Thanks!
Hi Tom, I think the most important thing is to get her a present than has meaning to her. It could be related to an inside joke you share, or her hobby, her favorite music, food, activities. It can be something small, but thoughtful. When in doubt, most girls like jewelery. 😉
Hi! I love reading your articles and have saved several to refer back to. I have a (he would say the same)connection with an introvert, I’m an balance of both- ambivert. He and I have been in each other’s lives on/off for 30 years. We’ve recently come back around and shared an experience that I would say reconnected us even more. Trouble is we live in different states and neither of us want a long distance relationship- too hard and we are beyond the get to know ya stage. Issue- we’ve not emailed(one of norms of communication), since October. I reached out twice and got no response. Do I take this as he’s lost interest or he’s processing some of the pretty deep email convos we had? And do introverts participate in retreats when or if they go to one? He told me at 18 that he wanted to spend his life with me, well life went different for us, six years ago he told me “it’s always been you,” and he has said “I only have pancakes with you.” All things that I treasure. My daughter is an introvert and is very insightful as to helping me navigate through these last few months but I thought I’d ask you. Thank you so much for the articles they have helped me with my guy and my daughter.
Hi! This was a great article, and definitely was a nice reminder for my current relationship. I have been dating my introverted boyfriend for 3 years and I’m an extreme extrovert. He’s fairly introverted but I find that he doesn’t need as much time to himself as I originally thought to recharge. He tells me he loves me, but when it comes to talking about the future he’s always flakey. We both are looking at more schooling but I was hoping that he would at least say that he would want to make it work no matter what. He also had a really close relative that he loved dearly just die and because of that we stopped dating for about a month and then decided to get back together. He told me he wanted to break up because he needed the space. He says that he’s with me now and was before because we have fun together and he likes hanging around me.It’s really frustrating because the side of him I get over the phone is a such a sweet and heart felt guy while the guy I get in person is distant, removed and it seems like he couldn’t care less if I was around. He’ll invite me to things with his friends and family. I am just stuck I guess between trying to understand who he really is… if you could offer any advice I would greatly appreciate it!
I understand your frustration, Maria. Introverted men can be complicated. It may just be that he is at a point in his life when he can’t meet your needs. Introverts tend to push people away when they’re going through a loss, so I am not surprised that he needed a break. Whatever the reason for his distant behaviour, if you can’t get your needs met in the relationship, you might want to consider moving on.
My wife is very much introverted person.She loves me as a husband not friend.But she engaged a man as a good friend deeply.I feel very lonely.I very much frasted. Secretly she talk with her friend.I said him to close relationship with her friend. Then she does misbehaviour with me.What I do?please help me.How she comeback in my relationship.
Well done! Perfect.
I am in a budding long distance, could be amazing, “relationship” with a true blue introvert. Telephone talking is extrmemely uncomfortable for him. I understand. He’s wicked smart and creative. PhD without ever reading a single textbook. I mention this because reading doesn’t process with him. He reads and can hardly index and process it before he is on to the next thing. Texting is how we pursue this relationship and he texts often but doesn’t say much. When asked why, he stated, almost word for word something from your articles, about it being hard not to be disconnected and engage when not in person. I’m a bit unsure of what to do. He is worth the attempt to figure this out. I keep my texts short and somewhat superficial because of stated issues with reading. We don’t phone talk. He exhibits all of the “signs” that an introvert is interested. We see each other not too often (5000 miles is a LONG way away.) should i go ahead and text away the many real words I have and run the risk of overwhelming an introvert with words, or keep it simple and wait until next we see each other, to build from there? This almost connecting is kind of hurting. But pushing an introvert is never a good idea. Thoughts? Please?
I’m a guy. Met this girl, claims to be an extreme introvert. We’ve hung out.. a lot.. she had me meet all the people she loves.. mom n dad… a week later she says she needs to focus on work and can’t have a relationship right now in her life…. and pretty much barely talks to me now… what the HE’LL happened? Please help
I am in the same situation man, met this girl at work we got together on dates but before that we talked for 5 days straight we barely slept. We could talk about anything about deep stuff. She were complimenting my shirt how good I smell showed me her family photos and it not just me was who started the conversations sometimes she hit me up as well. Every sign show that she is into me. If this is the case with you then DONT GIVE UP!
Read every article you can on introverts that what I did to get to know them better. I dont have previous experience with introvert girls this is new for me. I know there is always a second chance!!! So dont give up! talk with her as friends try to understand her. Proceed slowly and it will work out just fine! have patience! Good luck man! I hope you guys can come back together because I am sure I will with her I promise 😀
Hi all, we met through friends with this introvert guy over 40, and it’s been over a month that we communicate and text. It’s a long distance relationship and he found it worthwhile to come and visit me for a couple days. We spent hours together, me doing most of the talk but it was nice for both of us. Now that he is back, he is trying to keep up but I go crazy when he returns my messages in 3-4 hours.. We talk once a day but always at the same time. It’s not like we are sharing our lifes but as an emotionally fragile woman I need his attention and caring. I need the feeling of being in contact.. I believe he likes me a lot but I can’t tell him how I feel, my frustration because I don’t want to seem pushy. I have been respecting and understanding and doing exactly as your article says even without knowing. He enjoys talking to me and opens up to me, we joke and laugh when we talk but I am feeling heartbroken and upset since we don’t have the ordinary daily normal communication even friends have.
Both of us want to head towards a serious relationship but what I want to learn is when we are truly in love, will he be able to give me the much needed affection and caring? I am OK with staying at home or silently cuddling together, or just enjoying silence from time to time but I need to feel the love and caring and that I am the ONE for him. How can I find out that he will also be able to give me the attention I need? I have my own issues when it comes to attention and affection by the way..
All help and ideas are much appreciated.. Thank you all in advance…
Great! I am an extrovert girl and I am talking with someone from online dating and he is introverted guy. On the first few months of our conversation, he doesn’t share as much as I do, and I asked him to take a selfie and send it to me, well- he is sending me his previous pictures from before while he was kinda emo type introvert, and it’s quite annoying coz I really wanted to see him just the way he is, but still my patience is intact then suddenly one day he sent me a selfie of him and it was literally a good looking young man! 🙂 I was happy and he is starting to share about his life and the possibility of meeting us in person. Yet, he has a lot of questions to asked about me, coz he wanted to read my mind as if I am not being true to him. As an extrovert and expressive I guess, he will know when someone is fake or being genuine. I am looking forward to meet him so soon.. And I guess he is falling for me.. hahaha that’s why now a days I’m looking for a blog that will give me an idea how to make introvert fall in love coz that’s what I wanna do.. , he got me curious about him and wanting to get to know him more… Introverts are quite interesting to encounter with the extroverts. While reading your post, all I think of was him.. he is quite the same. 🙂
And oh by the way, He is from Australia and I am from the Philippines. 🙂
Love,
Maria 24
(Dont mind m grammar) Hello, uhm i have friend. She is an introvert. We meet at our school, we are on the same year level. At first we are not too close with each other but we had a little conversation. As time goes by, after 4 years we became like bestfriends, we talk a lot now and share thoughts. And yeah im inlove with her. At first i really thought she’s not normal. Because this week we meet everyday. We go out together, hangout together. Its like i feel im special to her, but then next week she’s gone or i cant communicate her. At first im worried or geting paranoid. And yeah in 4 years i learn that she is lke that haha. So, im always givig her time to spend for herself coz she told me its theor way to recharge. But my question is, how can i confess my feelings to her? Or should i confess to her? You know that we are close friend. If i letvher know my feelings for her im afraid i might lose her and our friendship. My plan is, i want her to confess IF she’s into me haha but yeh introverts aint like that so please help mee, how can i confess to her without breaking our friendship relationship and how would i know if she likes me (like or love me)
Hi my partner split up with me around two months ago, We were really struggling in the relationship because I didn’t understand her needs, recently I stumbled upon this attachment style and it all makes sense now, I really want to be back in a healthy relationship with her and so I explained about what I had researched and asked if we could take things at a slow pace and see where it takes us but she said she never wants to get back into a relationship with me and she won’t even meet me for coffee, but she wants to stay in contact with me. How can I regain her trust and love? I do understand it would be a slow process but I need some advice on where to start. I look forward to your response.
As an introvert girl, I can say that if she doesn’t want to get back together with you, it really means that way. Introverts usually think through something a lot more than people think and confirming it before they say it out loud. When she outwardly made up her mind about something, she wouldn’t change it no matter how much her heart flutters towards you. It’s just a way of saying things won’t be the same anymore even if you both get back together again. There will still be negative thoughts of you two lingering even if you two get back together, which she won’t be able to handle it. She will choose to stay truthful to the choices she made. And I just realise this text is from 2 years ago.
How do i know that she really loves me?
(she being an introvert)
Are her words true and that is how she loves? how do introverts show love or love?
Also we just moved in with each other. Any advice in living with an introvert. I want her to stay true to herself since that is who i fell in love with and to be free, she can be distant at times i know that just how she is and not to be read into.
I mate an introvert girl,it was like love at the first sight.we had sometimes conversation but it was not working.i just proposed her because i wanted to move on and as expected she rejected me. I really love her. I am serious about her. what should I do? please help me.
Me and my introvert man has been battling to have a healthy relationship for over 4years I’m an extrovert and didn’t understand all this complications untill 4days ago we had a heated argument and i said hurtful stuff i truely love him and only started looking this guides out because he refuses point blank to talk to me……if there is a way to fix this please help…..
advice is to give him space to think about it. introverts need more time to process and think about what they did and what they should be doing than others do. he will come back to you once he feels like it, so don’t push him to give you an answer because that will annoy him even more and will stop reasoning. just a piece of advice for anyone out there since this post has been 1 year ago.
I like an introvert guy. But when I told him about my feelings, he started avoiding me. He had a tremendous bad break up with his 7years long relationship. It’s not that he’s ignoring me completely but he never text me or if I ask him to go out he skillfully avoid it. Please help me with the matter. I want him to communicate atleast.
You should try to stop talking to him a while to see if he tries to text you back or comment on your recent posts. If he does, it means there’s still a chance that he’s fine with talking to you, if not, he just doesn’t have interest in talking to you and I guess you should just leave it at that.
I’m kind of in the same position as you right now but when I confessed to him, he was kind to explain to me why he rejected me and said that he didn’t mind to hang out sometime. Although his really bad with texting, I tried to initiate calls or hangouts. It has been really tough for me since I’m an introvert girl. I’ve never had the courage to initiate anything with boys before, suggesting the reason why a majority of boys stopped talking me haha.
There is a girl in my university and she study another field than but we have 30min class together every week
She always comes in with her firends and goes out with them so i literally only have less than 5 min to talj to her each time but im really into her. What should i do?
Whats your suggestion?
Get out your comfort zone for that 5 minutes 😉
I recently started to like an introverted guy in my hostel, my friend told me to go ahead and talk to him so I did it 2ent well I asked for his name and he simled telling me he will see me around… That night I wrote on a paper..(so my friend sent it and said he found this paper in front of his door it might be for him or his roommate) I was expecting him to wait till his roommate to come but he texted me quickly.. and the conversation went well.. but I don’t know what to do,, I barely see him around and I’m too shy to go see him because I don’t even know what to say to him at the same time Im happy if he texts me or just to see him….
I need major help
Hi, how can I rekindle my friendship with an introvert that has gone in hybernation?
We are officemates. He told me that he wont be active in any social medias for now since I have told him before about my feelings for him and he taught I was rushing him to have relationship. ( He had a failed on and offf relationship of 4yrs) from then on he has never been the same for the past 2yrs.
I have told him that i have given up the idea of having an intimacy relationship with him and just wanted to be his friend.
That did not work. And he told me its too late for him
What can I do to bring back the times he use to be.
I recently reconnected with an ex of 10+ years, and quickly realized he’s been an introvert all along…
While home visiting he reached out and we spent 4 days of the trip together. It caught me off guard that I still felt chemistry, and now that he is back home the communication is minimalistic and I am confused and don’t know if I should reach out or just leave it alone.
Hey , I’m in love with an introvert girl and I want ask some thing that do they like if I message her gm , gn daily or should I text her in gap of a day ? And how should I text her that she will like it and conversation would not go boring please do guide..
My story is much like the others here who have fallen in love with an introvert. I get so lonely without him and it breaks my heart. I have considered moving out of state because he’s the only reason I stay here but he gives me very little to hold onto. When he does come around it beautiful. He is beautiful to me. Though sometimes he has to have a few beers to open up to tell me what he want to say and that he cares deeply for me. It’s been 3 months at a snails pace of seeing him if I am lucky twice a week and then sometime I won’t see him for awhile. An average of 8 time a month we get together. The frustration and loneliness hurts so bad I want to run away so I am not tempted to want to bother him or push him away. My conversations with him seem always to be about wanting more time with him. So leaving it’s not to hurt him but to runaways from him and my feelings, like a self preservation and relationship protection of sorts. He knows I love him, I think he loves me and he has said he loves but when he’s buzzed and on a roll talking. He says he doesn’t know how to fit me into his life. It’s so weird because we do live each other but have this war with his introvertness. I don’t want to be left in the wings and want to be loved back. I wonder if I go that maybe he will then want me more because people usually want what when it’s gone. What are your thoughts on this?
I fell in love with an introvert and told him that I liked him. he shook my hand and asked for my number. The only thing is that he shakes hands with everyone ( not everyone but a lot of girls) and he told me he likes me too but I don´t think he does anymore because I held his hand and he acted weird about it and was uncountable and seemed like he really disliked me holding his hand, but then he said he will miss me. I really don´t understand him. Please give advice. (he might not seem like an introvert but he is)
Hi,
Thats an amazing map.
Help me out here..I’m into this introvert girl, even she likes me, we aren’t in relationship yet. I’m in the Army. The thing we bond really amazing when we are together, but then ,the time ends and I got to get back to my duty, then it’s a long distance talk over phone. I do understand introvert- so don’t video call people until you feel like, so it’s mostly just the voice calls. After we meet , the 1st few weeks talks are amazing, she opens up completely as she used when we were together, but then it started to fade out. And then I released that she talks to not because she WANTS to but she HAS to. I mean, that she kind of feels it being forced upon. And now while talking we run out of topics and it gets awkward ?. Iam an extrovert, but it’s really hard for me to exhibit my extrovert behaviour to her, the reason is unknown . I figured things would be back to place if we met again, but then the pandemic started and forced to be put things in hold. I even had to cancel my flight ticket. As I said , I’m in the Army, it’s not possible for me to be there for her always, help me out here, what do I do now .
I’m afraid this might fall apart
I am introvert but I love a girl who is extrovert how can I make overcome my fear and make her to fall in love with me
I am introvert but I love a girl who is extrovert how can I make overcome my fear and make her to fall in love with me.
Plz can you make write me a mail to impress her
My introverted BF of 18 months is genuinely lovely and the time we have together alone is great. I am extroverted and if we argue about something he goes days without texting or messaging me which drives me mad and makes me needy. I have tried so hard to understand introverts but it is really difficult and I feel lonelier now more than I have ever been. He told me he loves me and we have plans to move in together but I have only met his family once and i don’t know if its me being needy or if I am just not use to not getting love and attention. This makes me doubt our relationship and I often feel like I should end it but I do love him and we are really good together. Is it that introverts are better suited to introverts?? Tonight I am going to bed feeling heartbroken as he left this morning after we had a disagreement last night and he hasn’t text all day. I don’t want to feel like this anymore but don’t want to lose him 🙁
I have a date with a extroverted female, this fridayI really like her, She told me she was extroverted, so I’ve been reading about it. N you know what I’m ready.. to follow all of this tips.. km gonna take her at to eat. But I read extroverted females don’t like crowded, or noisy places, so I’m gonna take her to a picnic. To a park next to a lake. It will be quite comfortable, n i will listen n pause n respect n moments of silen.. talk to her while doing something to avoid eye contact. I am ready wish me luck n thank you for the tips.
Thanks alot for your map!!!
But I want to say that with this map shown, I have messed things up for myself already….. How will I get it over and make things better???
I lost my introvert girlfriend, we are still what you would call friends. It was not a bad break up. (Revolved around her dad and emotional abuse) We hung out once afterwards and had a good time. Now she will not, she has told me she will get back to me or says she misses me and we should hang out, but nothing ever becomes of this. She won’t tell me why we can not hang out even when I have asked her she just does not answer. At times she seems to take one step forward then two back. I feel she is still in love with me (it has been three months since we broke up) but something is holding her back. How do I unravel this mystery. And win her heart back?
My name is Manjunath, and I am from India, in India, normally we get engaged even without having a single date or being in a relationship. The same case has happened to me. I got engaged after my parents selected a girl for me and she is pretty as well. After getting an engagement I thought it will be more exciting to talk with her chat with her, but she doesn’t like chatting talking and she even doesn’t respond to my messages and ignores my calls often even after one month of our engagement. I was confused for a while about whether she really likes me or not but after reading this article I think she is an Introvert girl. Please tell me some suggestions How I should behave with her? I am totally getting bored after my engagement, I want to talk to her, make her impress, and share my feelings with her, but she doesn’t care much about me. One day I asked her whether she really likes me or not and if she is happy with our engagement, she said yes and she doesn’t care much about me. I don’t want to lose her and I am worried whether she will behave the same after my marriage? Please guide me on how I should make her fall in love or make her care for me love me? Till today I behave to her patiently, listened to her words, and tried to make her impress by gifting or making jokes but she doesn’t react to anything.
I got married to an Introvert woman which i never knew that she an introvert person on till we separated last year because we use to fight and we have two kids,i and my family an friends have beg her and her family too beg her to come back to me, but she refuse to come home and she said i should give her sometime and i don’t want to lose her,because i real love her so much .
meanwhile bought her a car this year to beg her to come back to me, but she refuse…pls i need your advise and what can i do to win her heart back to me and for her to fall in love with me again
i await for your response
Thank you
Terry
All of this is incredibly helpful, thank you.
However, I’m afraid that I have already scared the introvert that I just started seeing off, after reading this.
How can I adequately communicate that I’m educating myself on introversion, and should I apologize for not giving them adequate time to answer questions face to face? I was ignorant to the fact that he is extremely introverted until AFTER our second date and intimacy.
How can I gain an introvert girl heart if she’s not giving for attention for while eg.if she replied lately and no calls
It’s hard to say in your specific situation, but gaining more confidence and flirting skills will help. Here is a free flirting guide: https://introvertspring.com/flirting-guide-for-introverted-men/
I am in love with a introvert. She flirts with me but when I tell her how I feel she always avoids to answer. She once called me MR handsome and like I said when I flirt with her she flirts back but she never replies when I say I like and I want her to be my women.
If you loose an introverts trust. How do you regain it???
I can clearly relate to all these points you have raised up. I still feel like she has not forgiven me for avoiding her in my quest of convincing her to have sex with me for the 3rd time. I believe I have to give her time think 🤔 about me and I HV a part to play also
I am a couple months into a relationship with an introverted guy who also has fairly limited relationship experience. I aHe has told me he definitely likes me and hanging out with me, but he is unsure if he’ll develop deeper feelings. Is this a normal feeling for an introvert? Is the relationship doomed? He is the ideal partner to me and am falling in love with him.
I so much appreciate this point but how do you get to make an introvert trust you after she has been mishandle by the wrong person in the past and don’t believe in love again