Group conversations are, and always have been, a pain in the ass for me. They make me feel awkward, inhibited, and totally out of my element.
As a fellow introvert, maybe you can relate? You know what it’s like to wonder what to say and when to say it. You wait for a pause so you can share your thoughts, but it never comes. So, you stay quiet. Then comes the worst part …
“Why are you so quiet?” they ask, as if it weren’t the most annoying question in the history of annoying questions. You already felt weird for not knowing what to say. Now, you’re also embarrassed that others have noticed.
If you’ve ever experienced the above scenario, you are all too familiar with the PAIN of group conversations for introverts. You’ll also probably relate to my disdain for work lunchrooms, and small talk.
So, how can little ol’ introverted me become an ace at group conversations? How can I be that person who always knows what to say, and when to say it. The one who tells long hilarious stories, and commands the conversation like a boss.
To be honest, I probably can’t — at least not on a consistent basis. Now, before you get all “you can do anything you put your mind to” on me, hear me out.
Why it’s so hard
Group conversations work against, rather than with, an introvert’s strengths. They overwhelm us, and don’t give us enough time to think about what we want to say. Asking an introvert to command a group conversation (in a social setting, not a meeting) is like putting Angelina Jolie in a rom-com. We can do it, but it just won’t feel right.
HOWEVER, we can get better at talking in groups. We can be engaged, and tell a few cool stories. We can also take a quality over quantity approach to what we share. With this in mind, here are three tips for conquering group conversations in your own introverted way.
3 Ways introverts can improve at group conversations
Use facial expressions to show that you are engaged. Raising your eyebrows, smiling, and making eye contact when appropriate can make all the difference!
React to what others share. Show that you are listening by laughing at another person’s joke, or nodding your head in agreement. You can also make short ’n’ sweet comments like, “great story”, or “that’s hilarious”. This shows that you’re engaged even though you’re not saying very much.
Develop authentic introvert charisma that shines through silence. Introverts can be quietly charismatic, and deliciously intriguing. It all begins with developing confidence and connection skills in a way that feels natural to you. I show you how with my free Introvert Charisma Blueprint (access it here).
What do you think? Am I the only one who feels this way about group conversations? Or do you understand my pain? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Share away in the comments below! 😉
Lots of love,