INFJ self-care

INFJ self-care is a hot topic these days, and for good reason. If there’s one thing INFJs struggle with, it’s this: putting ourselves first – or even second, or third, for that matter. We care for others all the time, You won’t find a more supportive friend, and understanding partner than an INFJ.

The level of our care and concern for the wellbeing of those we cherish is otherworldly. Problems occur when we focus little on our own needs. Taking care of ourselves is not easy for the INFJ personality.

A daunting task

Imagine this scenario. You are invited to a social gathering (a party or conference). Your INFJ intuition is screaming that you shouldn’t go because you will get overwhelmed. The people there are extroverts who always call out introverts as “weird”. Saying no as a primary INFJ self-care tool sounds like a good choice. However, here’s what happens instead.

You accept the invitation because you feel guilty that you’ll offend someone if you don’t go. Your kind INFJ mind doesn’t want to argue. Instead, you go to a place, which will only cause you to feel drained. You’re also dreading hearing questions like: “Why are you so quiet?” or “Why are you standing near the exit?” I experienced this scenario more times than I can count.

Instead of spending a quiet night, tucked in your blanket fort, and watching Netflix, you attend a noisy, unpleasant gathering. And you feel terrible about it. Don’t blame yourself, it’s not your fault. INFJs want to make everyone around us feel good, but we forget that we, too, need to take care of our own needs.

The truth behind INFJ self-care

When focusing attention on ourselves, INFJs start feeling selfish and guilty. Uncontrollable thoughts that we are arrogant, not caring enough, and that we don’t deserve to have any friends start to appear. These feelings paint a false picture because the truth is that taking care of yourself is not selfish!

Love and honor yourself by dedicating time firstly to yourself. Don’t finish a bad book, don’t watch a movie because everyone say it’s good, but you think it’s bad. Travel alone, have a glass of wine alone, don’t go to that party because someone is pressuring you. Stay home and eat ice cream instead if that makes you happy. Or don’t get out of bed the entire morning if you want to nap.

INFJ self-care isn’t easy, but when you care for yourself you’ll have the necessary strength to help others. You cannot pour from an empty glass, it must be filled. There’s nothing wrong with making yourself a priority. In fact, people will respect you more. But most importantly, you will attain that much needed self-respect you so rightfully deserve.

Give the people you hold dear your unconditional attention, but think about yourself, too. Your biggest strength comes from the inside. When you refuel your INFJ mind and body you will be able to share that amazing light that shines from your gentle soul.

You deserve to nurture and watch over your wise mind and caring heart. Honor your INFJ personality by doing what will make you happy and fulfilled.

If you’re interested in connecting with other INFJs from around the world, join Introvert Spring’s private INFJ forum. We are truly a buzzing community! Join today, and you’ll receive our 20-page INFJ Relationship guide as a gift. You’ll also gain access to unique INFJ blog posts, member events, and videos.

What are your thoughts on INFJ self-care? Do you look after yourself? Please feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below.



Hi, I’m Marko, the Introvert Spring INFJ forum coordinator. I’m a writer and certified professional coach, with a rich background in leadership and communications. Right now, my biggest passion is helping to grow the Introvert Spring INFJ forum, so INFJs have a place to feel seen, understood, and inspired.