INFJ self-care

There isn’t the slightest chance that INFJs will ever stop caring. No other personality type has the same level of concern that we have. But in our desire to be there for others, we tend to put ourselves last on our priority list.

Why INFJs put ourselves last

Being an INFJ, I had extreme difficulties making myself a priority in the past. I always saw it as my life mission to help others no matter what. Only when my mind and body sent me unpleasant signals did I start paying attention to myself more.

I believe you can relate with the feeling of overwhelm that comes when all our energy is spent. INFJs give away all our time, so we’re bound to exhaust our reservoirs at a certain point. This is when problems start to happen.

When INFJs spend so much time caring for others while disregarding our own needs, three things happen:

• Everything becomes unbearable and we lose our sharp focus
• We become restless and not able to effectively communicate
• Our self-sabotage levels are increased and we start doubting ourselves

Don’t worry, all of this can be prevented. No matter how selfish you may think this feels (and it’s not), you have to prioritize your own wellbeing so that you can help others.

Your #1 priority has to be you

This is not about being careless about how others feel. Quite the contrary. When you put yourself first, you’re automatically allowing yourself to get that much need breather. You’ll be able to help more later on when you’re fully recharged.

It’s good you want to be present for everyone, but here’s the thing. How are you going to be there for the ones you care for, if you’re unable to safeguard yourself?

You need to accept that because you’re an INFJ (who always thinks about everyone else), you too deserve to be a priority in your life. Give yourself the permission to indulge your own needs. Whether that means turning your phone off, not responding immediately to a request, or just taking a stroll through the park without looking at your laptop, just give yourself a break!

I promise you, the world will not set itself on fire if you step aside a little.

Beautiful things will start to happen when you embrace yourself as a prime character in your book of life. I know you want to be connected with the ones you love, but let me ask you something.

Do you think your loved ones want you to completely disregard your own needs?

I think they would want you to look after yourself.

Be the hero of your story

You’re an INFJ, and having such an understanding heart, you earned the right to be a little selfish. The greatest achievement of our personality type is the realization that we’re not here to save the world. It was there before us.

Want to know a little secret?

You’re here to shine so that others may bask in that kindness. But please, don’t forget to take care of that INFJ light by putting yourself as a priority. You’re the gold medalist of your own life’s Olympics, and a hero of your story. Be proud of that title.

Now onto you

How do you feel about prioritizing your own needs? Do you give yourself that much needed self-care? I would love to hear from you on this important topic, so feel free to share your comments and thoughts. ☺

Remember to sign up for our new Introvert Spring INFJ forum and share your thoughts in a safe environment. You’ll gain access to unique INFJ blog posts, INFJ discussions, private messaging, webinars, ebooks, and so much more. Go here to check out the new INFJ forum.



Marko Kircanski INFJ coaching