Have you ever wondered why so many INFJs have anxiety? Or why it’s such a taboo topic, especially among introverts? Don’t get me wrong, a lot of people have anxiety. But when you consider the fact that there’s only around 1.2% of INFJs worldwide, you might think: Are INFJs susceptible to anxiety more than others?
Why is anxiety so devastating to an INFJ?
Before I tell you why, first let’s look at a classic example of INFJ anxiety. I love communicating through text messages. Because people I love the most don’t live close to me, we communicate through WhatsApp and Facebook.
But as helpful as text messages can be, they are one of the main sources of my anxiety. When you are an intuitive INFJ like me, you notice every change in sentence construction. You see the pattern beyond words. If my friend sends me a short message after something I said, my anxiety will kick in, as I wonder, what did I do wrong?
Overthinking is also a major issue for INFJs, but let’s focus on anxiety right now. If my INFJ mind perceives that I did something wrong, my anxiety will sky-rocket. For the rarest personality type, it’s devastating because we don’t know about the term balance.
Don’t sweep anxiety under the rug
Back in the good ol’ days when I didn’t know exactly who I was, I would try to ignore my anxiety as if it wasn’t there. I would work until I fell asleep on my desk. I believed that would make me forget about the emotion that caused me to doubt everything I say and do.
The funny thing about INFJ anxiety is that it can come so fast that you simply can’t prepare for it.
It will feel as if all your senses are under attack. Being an INFJ, you’ll feel helpless because your mind wasn’t ready to deal with this just now. Not only that.
You will also feel overwhelmed from the smallest action. When this happens, here’s what I want you to remember:
Don’t shake your anxiety away like it’s not there. I made the mistake of thinking I am overreacting and disregarded what my mind and body were telling me. Slow down. One of anxiety’s greatest tricks is that it convinces us that the worst-case scenario happened and there’s nothing you can do about it.
Even if you find yourself in a state of panic, there is still something that you can do about it.
This is where Michaela and I come in with our brand new Conquering INFJ anxiety INFJam, we are going to show you:
- 5 ways to cope with INFJ anxiety
- Proven techniques to feel better fast
- An easy exercise to relax an overthinking mind
Join our Conquering Anxiety INFJam now!
This will be one of those special Jams where we address an important issue that plagues the majority of INFJs on a daily basis. As always, you will have the chance to communicate with other INFJs in the chat box, or simply sit back and enjoy the show. It’s your choice, dear. 😉
Xo,
Marko
Thank you for this article. I am currently suffering from a bad bout of low mood and anxiety and as an INFJ, I feel like I am going insane. I notice everything. Every change in tone, every ‘yup’ and it’s excruciating.
You are most welcome Maven. I hear you… You are not alone. I know it’s not easy sometimes, but you got this.
Me to,my mind is my emeny
Amazing the short replies of “yup,” “yep,” etc make me analyze the conversation over and over.
I thought I was crazy until I took the personality test and started to understand who I am at 55 years old.
It’s such a relief to know that there are others who can relate to my struggles. Sometimes I really would think that I was some type of “chosen one” because I literally feel spirits, notice small details in body language, emotions, expressions, and everything I am so absorbing of everything. I always feel a bit alone with a husband and two kids, because how could anyone understand what it like living as a Cancer (7/8), INFJ, with my story. Now I know others can truly relate. Thanks for creating this INFJ community.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, Salleya. You are not alone. 🙂
Um, my name is Faraz and I am a 16 years old guy, well I have a question, to me honest I have alot of questions but i will only ask a few, I am an introvert,I can’t sleep at nights, why I overthink, every single night my brain just imagine my whole life, from 16 to my death with a different perspective, like different profession, girl, etc, there is always one common thing, a girl like me which I meet, a job I always want to do, I am imagining these things since I was 10 and still tjere is the same girl, and same desires, do you think that if I even get such a girl ( I am searching from last 5 years) and the job, If I achieved whatever I think, will I be able to sleep peacefully, because now I can’t, my dreams are too big, they can’t match with my life, I end up being sad, my imaginations are too high, why do you thinkit happens, no matter how much I try, everyday the same girl comes, but the scenario is different, meaning I met her a different way but in the end she ends up being that same girl, this happens every night, no matter how much I try to stop thinking it, try my best to sleep, yet no help, I can’t sleep, so I am mostly not fresh when it comes to school, the moment I put my head on bed, that same thing starts, so do you think that if I get everything I dream, will these imaginations stop and will I be able to sleep, or what if these are achieved, what if I started to see others?will it go on and on for my whole life, even getting these is impossible, you can’t have a girl that’s 100% like you maybe such a girl exist but there is 0.0000001 chance that I ever meet her, what do you think that why I dream these things? If I achieve them will they stop?or how can I get rid of these thoughts of mine coz they reslly trouble me. That world is really nice,like the one I want where was this is different, in it you want to achieve something, you have to do hardwork, I just want your thoughts on it, you can message me on my gmail, faraz.aj.21742@gmail.com
Dear Faraz, I will tell you exactly what I would tell to my 16-year old self. All your dreams will come true, stay true to your own path, but please don;t rush your life. You have time. This is not a sprint, this is a marathon. You will get where you want to go, but please don;t miss all those amazing things thinking about the future. You will find the girl of your dreams, the career you love, it will find you, but please, slow down and be in the now, because now is all we got. You got this, and you can do this. There is no such thing as a “too big” dream. Dream big, because this is how they turn to reality. Follow them! 🙂
Hi! Do you organize the INFJam at later point again? I tried logging in at it sais “Sorry, you’re too late”. I don’t know how I got on this page, I search the internet and here I am 😀 Thanks!
Hi Katja! Yes, INFJams are being held every first Tuesday of every month. 🙂 Glad you found us!
Can relate to this, after saying something get even more concerned on why I had to say it that way and how the other person is taking it
I hear you, and can fully understand that…
Hi Marko,
Your insightful blog is sincerely splendid and refreshing. There is an encompassing word to express my gratitude felt when reading your affirming and authentic blogs. How alone we INFJ types feel. I have suffered a lifetime of anxiety due to society’s demands requiring us ‘to be outgoing and always articulate and wanting to be just so.” Thank you,thank you for encouraging and educating the other personality types that even though we are quite and innerwardly reflective we are content with life and gifts possessed within our personality type.
Again,thanks for your outstanding blog!!
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for such heartwarming and kind words Dawn. I am deeply humbled by reading what you wrote here, thank you! 🙂 You are not alone, and it’s an honor to read what you said here.
Hey Marko,
I have some problems with this article. The main thing I’m having a tough time with is the implication that what you describe as typical symptoms of anxiety are exclusive to INFJs. (You’re referring to anxiety as “INFJ anxiety” a couple of times, suggesting that these types of anxiety are exclusive to, or at least more likely among INFJs. I think it would have been better if this article was aimed at a more general audience, not specifically INFJs.) I am not an INFJ, and I have the exact same mindset when I’m texting and I don’t quite get the answer I wanted. I start to overthink, I become overly critical of myself, and I put the responsibility for this “mistake” on myself. I’m gonna have to be blunt here and assume that you are just overthinking the conversation as well. I don’t think you are “noticing every change in sentence construction, because you’re an intuitive INFJ”. You also mentioned that “INFJ anxiety” can come on so fast that you can’t prepare for it. Again, will have to be blunt here, this has little to do with you being an INFJ. I am not an INFJ, and my anxiety attacks also come on really fast, and I can’t prepare for them. Same thing goes for helplessness when feeling overwhelmed by an “INFJ anxiety attack”. It has little, if anything, to do with you being an INFJ. Oh, and one last bit of negativity before I go on trying to balance out my bluntness, you didn’t actually explain if INFJs are more susceptible to anxiety than others, which you did mention in the introduction.
Moving on, there are a few good things about this article as well. I wholeheartedly agree with the message that you need to confront your anxiety. I also assume the article was written with the, admittedly good, intention of helping people deal with anxiety. A part of me can’t thank you enough for that, because this is information that people need to hear before they spiral out of control.
Thanks for sharing your honest thoughts Kevin! 🙂
Sorry, you’re too late. You can’t deal with anxiety.
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts on this, M! However, I would have to disagree, as there are ways anxiety can be approached and handled. 🙂
Well, it’s ONLY too late IF you die. While you’re still breathing, you can still face your anxiety, or what-f***ing-ever inner demons you have. Snap the f*** out of it, and win your life. We are INFJs. We are f***ing DO-ERS. Whatever we want, we get.
Stay strong bro. May the force be with you.