INFJ failure

How many times have you wanted to do something, but never did because you feared that it wouldn’t work out? Being INFJs, we’ll analyze every possible outcome before taking action. It’s not that we’re afraid to start, but the fear of failure deeply troubles our INFJ mind. We worry that we will do our best, but it won’t be enough. And we will fail.

The INFJ Fear of Failure

I wanted to share my experience with failure, so that you know I understand you. Many believe that I’m this unbreakable INFJ figure that can beat failure no matter what. But not many know that at the end of 2016, I was on the verge of quitting everything. I thought I was failing at what I do, and that I wouldn’t know how to live my purpose.

That was by far one of the most difficult moments when it comes to my own fear of failure as an INFJ. I thought I wasn’t good enough, and that I wasn’t worthy of the chance that was given to me. Suffice it to say, that was classic INFJ imposter syndrome combined with fear. Luckily, my mentor knew exactly what to do, and she understood how to bring me back.

I still have moments when I doubt who I am. Sometimes, my fear of letting myself and those who believe in me down outweighs my positive attitude. I’m human after all, and I have my own demons that sometimes try to make me feel worthless. As an INFJ, you understand how scary that can be.

Because I know how frightening the fear of failure is for INFJs, I’ll share with you three effective ways you can conquer it, and approach it from a different perspective.

1. Fear motivates.

Every action and thought that makes you feel uncomfortable comes out of fear. When you want to make a change, you’re afraid of the unknown and of what might happen. That’s when you need to use fear as a fuel, because it will not only pump the necessary adrenaline for you to focus, but also prove that what you’re doing matters.

2. Failure is a hidden lesson.

Even though we are rare and misunderstood, INFJs are the most determined personality type. When we’re moving towards our goal, nothing will stop us. We won’t hurt anyone, but we won’t give up either. The fear of failure is justified, but accepting it is not. Even if things don’t go as planned, try again and again until you succeed. Embrace the failure as a lesson that had to be learned.

3. Be fearful, not fearless.

I know this sounds contradictory, but here’s the catch. Trying to be fearless when approaching a problem won’t work. Instead, acknowledge that you’re scared, but give that sensation a meaning. It’s not about the lack of fear, it’s about knowing it’s there, but choosing to do it anyway. This is the definition of courage.

Fear of failure is one of the biggest reasons why so many INFJs don’t live the life they imagined. I’m scared of so many things, and one of my worst nightmares (warning, vulnerability ahead) is that I won’t be there for the ones I care for the most. But instead of allowing that fear to consume me, I’ve decided to use it as an ally.

Fear is not the enemy

Not a week goes by that I don’t tell the ones who matter the most to me how much I cherish them and how valuable they are. Of course I’m scared I’ll bother them, but the funny thing about us INFJs is that the right people are drawn to our authenticity like magnets.

If you have a fear of failure, remember that you are not alone my fellow INFJ. I’m not saying that to give you a pat on the back, because you’re strong enough to succeed even without that. Just know that there’s nothing wrong with being scared of failing. <3

Famous American actor, Denzel Washington, gave a wonderful explanation on the fear of failure that is definitive proof of why you’re destined to succeed. It’s only a matter of time.

“You will fail at some point in your life. Accept it. You will lose. You will embarrass yourself. You will suck at something. But to get something you never had, you have to do something you never did. And when you fall throughout life, fall forward.”

Have you read this yet?

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Now to you

What are your thoughts on the fear of failure? Feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section below, I would love to hear what you think. ☺



Marko Kircanski INFJ coaching